Not to brag but uh
I have three armadillo stuffies 😏 of varying sizes and styles 😏 and a pillow with five little tumbling armadillos on it that says "this is how I roll" 😏 you guys must be so intensely jealous of me

armadarnit

my squad

Literally crying with jealousy

/hj
I am rather jealous tho

yeah it wasn't a suggestion it was a command
you guys must be intensely jealous of me /j

actually do you guys want to see all my stuffies? they all have names and stories and I'm currently cuddling them all that's why I was thinking abt them

what are we gonna say, No?

I mean you could but I'd show you anyway

so starting with the picture I just posted, from left to right, Amy the Armadillo
I got her from the gift shop at the St. Louis zoo when I was a wee lad of ten years old and she and the dillo on the right have been best friends ever since

center we have Thompson, who was a gift for my 19th birthday
one of Rita's first words was Squishmallow bc she loves him so much
he is new to the family but his void gaze and tiny smile endears him to all who see him
he's also very good for chucking in the air as a stim

dillo on the right was my first stuffie ever
she was purchased from a gas station as a goodbye present from my dad when he was deployed to Iraq
her name is Dillo bc I couldn't talk when I received her and my mom named her for me

she has had her nostrils surgically re-installed three times over the course of my life and she has a permanent ketchup stain on her tail and I would sooner part with my new battle jacket than her

we all know and love Theodore, my sheltering bulwark and rock upon which I fall in times of need
Purchased him from my very first WorldCon and wore him every day to work at Walmart on my belt loop
he is Very soft

Bubbe, who is a Boba Tea that I got on my 19th birthday from the chocolate factory downtown
Rita has tried to drink her several times bc she didn't really get that she's not actually boba until pretty recently

him >:] we've all seen T'challa and I have nothing more to add except the fact that he is one of a very large set that includes Iron Man, Spiderman, Hulk, and several others that I've seen at the same mall I purchased him from, but the T'challa design is by far the cutest and most human-like

Peach the Overseer
originally I purchased him in order to give him my deadname and pretend every time my parents called me that they were referring to him, but I was too chicken
he stood guard at the end of my bed during the last two years I was in my parent's house

he has three siblings, Mango, Strawberry, and Starfruit all of varying colors, who belong to my littlest sister Mango (that's why her code name is Mango, Mango was his first sister and was Assistant Overseer for a time) and I make sure to bring Peach whenever we have a family reunion so that the octopuses can have a reunion of their own

my largest stuffie who is named Tater for obvious reasons
he is the newest addition to my collection, Duck gave him to me for Hanukkah this past December
he's big enough that I can use him as a pillow and he's quite delightful

Aww
but also that's a mood
I wouldn't really wanna inflict my deadname on anything

Yeah . _.) I get that
I don't have anything against mine for other ppl or things I just think I was named it for a stupid reason and it doesn't fit me and nobody remembers it and I have no reason to be proud of it so I was hoping to bequeath it to someone else so that I didn't associate it with myself anymore but uh
my parents are scary :/

hard to get a good shot of this guy, especially what with Peach looming ominously in the background but this is Zoosh the Sushi Cat
he was gifted to me on my 18th birthday by my now gym bro Matt during WorldCon
originally I was going to name him Zeus but I would've had to explain that one to my mom and again
scary parents :/

:/

and finally
Spot
bc he is one and bc sometimes he's hard to if he falls into the crack between my bed and the wall
Got him from the giftshop of the Houston aquarium and you may be thinking Hold On why would they sell a dog stuffy at an aquarium? Dogs aren't aquatic mammals

the answer is bc he's an Aquarius and he showed up to the wrong audition

I have more but I could only bring so many to my new house so the others are still in my parents Cannibal Bin
which is the big plastic bin my siblings and I keep all our stuffies in
I have no idea why it's called that

but to name a few
I have a frog called Pollywogalina, a gift for my first birthday
a harp seal named Rover, from the St Louis Aquarium
A china doll named Rivka who was given to me by my dad's bio mom on the day before my brother's memorial service who doesn't really count as a stuffy but I have great respect for her

a worm named Wormy who was hand-made for me on my third birthday by Barium (she was supposed to be a human but I was a brutal three year old who couldn't overlook Wormy's lack of limbs)
A turkey named Goblin (so named bc he did a lot of Gobblin') who I got from a gift basket at my maternal grandma's church

that's all I remember off the top of my head

🥺🥺🥺 I love them!!!