Damn Madonna, I feel chastised and have a newly gained bit of respect for her after reading this . I’m going to start working on commenting on people’s appearance negatively moving forward. She made great points.

Sure. I mean ok. The world does refuse to celebrate women who are older than 45, no arguments. I think we should all accept our grey and wrinkles and jiggly skin gracefully. She was criticized for none of those things however.

I think there's the sense of a contradiction in that her ill-advised cosmetic surgery seems to be an attempt to stave off her over-45 appearance.

But her statement is well taken.

Yeah I'd agree that she makes a good point overall, and the media in general is stupidly narrow and fixated on silly things like this. But I think that part where she's throwing it onto the photographer makes me go "oh come on!" lol Let's not kid ourselves either. Embrace it if you're embracing it.

^^^ yes well said

She isn't wrong but there's some weird projection going on here. Any reaction I've seen was because everyone expects her to look 64 and have wrinkles. She should acknowledge the part she's playing in upholding an unreasonable standard that she disagrees with. (And rightly so.)

All the Patriarchy has to do to thrive is to keep turning women against each other for things like how they look. If I were cynical, I'd say that the the whole celeb-culture and fashion industries exist for no other reasons.

Chestnut : I personally joined others in criticizing her bad plastic surgery. I often judge celebs and how well they age, their plastic surgery, etc. I'm not going to call out people on that, but it's an aspect of my character I don't want to encourage. That's what I'm talking about specifically in this case.

PlurkDevi : I think you're right, to a point. Personally, I think people should do what makes THEM feel good. If they feel they need to shape their face and body in a certain way to feel good, that's entirely on them as long as they're doing it for themselves, not to toe the line on f'd up beauty standards set by society and the media.

Dovelove : I mean, it probably didn't do her any favors though. I think it's more like, she's damned if she does and damned if she doesn't when it comes to beauty standards. Like, let's be honest, of all the "mature" women we say are aging gracefully, are we positive none of them are getting any work done? No way. I bet all of them get something. Even if...

it's just some lip filler or a good dermabrasion, etc. Celebs are held up to especially high standards of the impossible, get enough work to look fresh and not your age but not so much you look fake.

We don't know where Madonna is on her journey, maybe she got work done, realized it was too much and is now, fuck this going to challenge this. Even if she's somewhat insincere, I think the message is important for me to hear.

I always think we could all probably be a little less critical of things like this - but I am guilty as the next for feeding it from time to time. (I did this recently actually, not Madonna but another actor) I also am a firm fan of - you do you - but when you do something wild, don't be surprised when the reaction is: whoa that's wild. Own it, and keep

doing whatever version of you you want to do.

Yeah, I just personally want to nurture the less critical side of me. I'm not going to police or judge others, but as cheesy as it sounds, be the change you want to see in the world. I think we're all too fixated on adhering to impossible beauty standards and not just that, being attractive shouldn't be seen as a positive quality.

It's like... not a negative quality either, mind you, but attractive should be like brown yes and red hair - just an aspect of who you are, not WHO YOU ARE.

I've been hiding what I look like for almost 20 years because I'm worried it doesn't match the picture others have of me in their minds. I'm not a famous person and yet the concerns about being judged by my appearance have that strong a hold on me. I don't think that's good.

dkronfeld : I don't think it exists for no other reason, but it thrives in some part because of that for sure.

They make gobs of money for (mostly) men too

For sure we all should be less critical of people's appearances, including our own. I am nervous every time I post a photo of myself

dkronfeld : yup! Men just have a different set of unrealistic beauty standards and a bit of ageism leeway but I know the less fair sex get their share.

Oh I thought you said from not for but hey both are true! Lol

I agree with that, but I think you misunderstood my reply; I wasn't lamenting the plight of men

dkronfeld : yeah, read my follow up, lol

Chestnut : definitely especially our own. And I can relate to the nervous about sharing your pictures, I’m sure you know that well. Took me 2 years to share my picture with Z and most SLers have only seen a pic of me from my mid 20s.

You glow though and have inner and outer beauty!

Ha! I missed it

OhCecilia I am no more beautiful than you friend. I am old, grey, and wrinkled. BUT I AM ALIVE and so I decided to embrace it.

Chestnut : nothing like major health crisis to remind you what really matters, right? It’s almost trite but it’s true, even though sometimes I’m guilty of forgetting