shibe☀️summer
[mh]
shibe☀️summer
yall the brain buzz situation has been. bad. lately
shibe☀️summer
and by lately i mean like maybe months but what the fuck is time anyway
shibe☀️summer
but it is like. i am falling down on simple tasks like cleaning. feeding myself. that sort of thing
shibe☀️summer
obviously work is going pretty good which is weird that i have the spoons for work but literally nothing else tho as I type that out now it seems less weird
shibe☀️summer
where are all my spoons? they are at my job
shibe☀️summer
i have left them there
shibe☀️summer
also like. i have never really had a problem with body image? but recently it is not good
terravesty
shibe☀️summer
like part of the reason i have been clothes shopping the past few days is i just do not feel good in my clothes. a lot of things are starting to not fit so well
shibe☀️summer
looking at myself in pictures from teh family vacation and I dont like it
shibe☀️summer
and like. i am generally around my heaviest weight that i've been. i'd hit this early in 2020 but I managed to get it back down during quarantine
shibe☀️summer
but then I fell off of working out and going climbing and it is back up
shibe☀️summer
and the fact that I am not doing real well on stuff like. dishes. and cooking. isn't helpng that a ton
shibe☀️summer
because then it becomes like. oh, there's nothing to eat in the housee. i guess i'll just Not Eat. which isn't good!
shibe☀️summer
it's really not good
shibe☀️summer
and i don't like it but every time im like "well maybe i should just get meal delivery or something" i look at how much it costs and then I don't wanna spend the money
shibe☀️summer
.....and my cat just horked on the carpet.
shibe☀️summer
anyway this is just to say that i am kind of struggling righ tnow
shibe☀️summer
like probably a more than normal amount of struggle
shibe☀️summer
and honestly i don't know what the fuck to do about it other than maybe see if I can get my brain drugs adjusted
shibe☀️summer
cuz otherwise im probably gonna wind up buried in dirty clothes and dishes and nearly passing out in public
terravesty
Not eating is not good '^' I'm sorry things is hard, friend
shibe☀️summer
it's very not good but i keep doing it
お茶の時間にしおぜ？
I also feel this friend, so know you aren't alone. These are trying times.
shibe☀️summer
it's very trying and i feel like i am failing
bwutawity
bwutawity
IT'S TRYING 
Many mistakes
you're not failing, you're living through year three of a work-from-home situation and striving to create new/normal routines in all of it. That's hard shit even for someone with a chemically balanced brain
shibe☀️summer
mmh
shibe☀️summer
these are true things
shibe☀️summer
mumbles sometimes i wish that life was less like a violent sine curve and more like a gentle logarithmic growth
shibe☀️summer
i miss math sometimes
the berried
lays on
shibe☀️summer
the berried
: lays with in the fields of existential angst
Many mistakes
literally typing to you from the floor with the dog rn
Many mistakes
sometimes you just gotta
shibe☀️summer
sometimes. yeah
shibe☀️summer
i at least put a bra on which is step one to going down the street to the grocery store
Many mistakes
world harsh and cold, dog solid and warm
Many mistakes
(and yeah I also cannot get any real adulting done without a bra on. social conditioning's a bitch)
shibe☀️summer
dog soft and full of good thumps
shibe☀️summer
cat also soft and full of soothing bees
Many mistakes
get yourself a dog you can play like a set of bongos
Many mistakes
that's true, bencat is being bees on my ankle
shibe☀️summer
Many mistakes
: oh i will go out without a bra on sometimes. i just. i need one in this particular moment because
shibe☀️summer
benbeee
Many mistakes
bra = structure
shibe☀️summer
yes
shibe☀️summer
bra also = i don't have to worry about my nips showing
shibe☀️summer
which is like. apparently a thing that we are also moving beyond as a society i guess???
shibe☀️summer
i continue to see a nonzero number of women wandering around in crop tops just fully nipping out and i feel old when i see it
shibe☀️summer
anyway I'm going to get groceries. I also put my gym membership on hold and scheduled a dermatologist appointment for next week
shibe☀️summer
when I get home I'm going to try to at least do a load of laundry
comfy drow cave
I'm sorry. I really do feel this. Everything is in a really rough place, and I'm sorry it's syphoning your life force rn
shibe☀️summer
it is real bad
shibe☀️summer
i did at least manage to go out and get some frozen burritos, frozen meals, and cereal
espresso witch
I'm sorry things are rough, we definitely need to reschedule Elvis and shopping!
y yo a ti, cas
woof this is real! i am sorry the brain worms are bad, and i love you. <3 <3 i am glad you got groceries