Quinn Angstrom
A confession
Quinn Angstrom
You know Bayformers
Quinn Angstrom
the transformer shots in those movies, while they transform
Quinn Angstrom
and the movie is just covering the entire screen with incomprehensible mechanical details moving around nonsensically
Quinn Angstrom
and they all look the same?
Quinn Angstrom
I love those
Quinn Angstrom
my dirty secret is that I think the bayformers look really cool
~Lamiamon~
it's not nonsensical, in the first few movies ILM gave everyone a planned out transformation scheme
~Lamiamon~
it's only around age of extinction that they turned into bullshit
Quinn Angstrom
yeah they do make sense if you look through it carefully it's more of a cinematography issue, where they're like...
Quinn Angstrom
they add up but they're so complex that you can't really tell
Quinn Angstrom
but I don't care it rules
Quinn Angstrom
it makes my brain go brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
~Lamiamon~
I get what you mean
Quinn Angstrom
people talk about how much it sucks that modern action blockbusters are just samey interminable CGI-fests
Quinn Angstrom
and I understand that sentiment
Quinn Angstrom
but also: can't relate
Quinn Angstrom
I love huge dumb CGI battles so much
~Lamiamon~
I will say this; Michael Bay and ILM managed to give the Transformers a sense of weight and scale that few other cgi mechanical constructs have yet to emulate
Quinn Angstrom
absolutely yeah
~Lamiamon~
it helps that everyone is like
~Lamiamon~
to scale
Quinn Angstrom
the movement on them is so heavy
Quinn Angstrom
the acceleration and anticipation are on point in every scene (in the early movies)
~Lamiamon~
like Starscream is dorito shaped because they needed to fold the mass of a jet into a size comparable to a car
~Lamiamon~
so instead of absurdly tall he's just wide
~Lamiamon~
idk I think people dismiss the early designs despite there being a lot of thought being put into them
Quinn Angstrom
Michael Bay put a lot of craftsmanship and care into making these
Quinn Angstrom
completely absurd movies
Ken
I really do feel like only The Last Knight feels like.

Phoned in.

Whatever quality they may have ultimately, he put Effort into the others.
~Lamiamon~
The Bumblebee movie went for more crowd pleasing/traditional designs at the cost of making them feel less real
~Lamiamon~
like Blitzwing for instance
~Lamiamon~
he turns into a jet, he should be able to step on Bumblebee and not notice it
Quinn Angstrom
was Bay even involved in TLK?
Quinn Angstrom
it's easily the weakest of the movies
~Lamiamon~
but because he's a traditional G1 "Seeker"-ish design he's like, maybe 2 times as tall
~Lamiamon~
yes he was
Quinn Angstrom
disappointing
~Lamiamon~
and then you have Shatter, who is simultaneously a VTOL jet and a car of similar size
Quinn Angstrom
I'm shocked to learn that Transformers, a franchise where the main villain turns into a gun that other transformers hold to shoot people with, has issues with size consistency in its designs
~Lamiamon~
I only point it out, Sven, because what Bumblebee did was in stark contrast to what the Bay movies did
HotXC
this is why Braves had robots that turn into guns turn into big finishing move mega cannon things
Quinn Angstrom
sven isn't in this plurk
~Lamiamon~
quinn, sorry
Quinn Angstrom
but I get what you're saying completely
Quinn Angstrom
I just think that the broader history of Transformers is extremely wild and fun
~Lamiamon~
Bumblebee is absolutely the better movie because it's like, not unfortunate as hell and full of gross shit, but it lost something I appreciated about the Bay movies
Quinn Angstrom
there's so much completely weird transformers content
Quinn Angstrom
all in different ways
~Lamiamon~
hot take: Megatron should turn into a gun that's the same size he is
Quinn Angstrom
it would rule
~Lamiamon~
just this massive transforming cannon that takes three guys to hold
Quinn Angstrom
he turns into a gun and like three other deceptions-- YES
Villain
Doesn’t he, in the 1985 movie?
Villain
I guess it’s not like a hand gun
~Lamiamon~
you're thinking of Galvatron, who turns into like, a space cannon
HotXC
https://images.plurk.com/ERTjWOiE2UJ0ZaZqXkgzK.png https://images.plurk.com/7lwxR7oFbvuKMyGYxP0m6i.png
~Lamiamon~
they were cowards and gave him supports to lean on
Quinn Angstrom
his undoing is that he needs three decepticons to hold him up without trying to betray each other
~Lamiamon~
Reflector can do it, he's three dudes that are all the same guy
moontouched
i feel like galvatron should turn into a satellite cannon
moontouched
just for extra OH FUCK HE CAN SHOOT HIMSELF NOW
~Lamiamon~
moontouched : ohhh like energon shockblast
moontouched
yeah yeah
moontouched
exactly
~Lamiamon~
https://imgs.plurk.com/QBo/GLM/8Pkf7fBdH1gtU2Y7L787f7T9nTx_lg.jpg
~Lamiamon~
I have this toy
~Lamiamon~
he looks like he turns into nothing but it's still fun
~Lamiamon~
honestly I have a lot of thoughts on how to modernize Transformers alt modes
~Lamiamon~
Soundwave should be a van with killer speakers that turn into his minions
Quinn Angstrom
already strong
~Lamiamon~
Starscream can turn into a jet same as always, but he should be like, huge
~Lamiamon~
and change nothing about his personality
moontouched
he will yell at you about how cool he is and nobody can fucking stop him
~Lamiamon~
still traitorous, still ineffectual, but towers over everyone else
moontouched
he's huge. are you gonna argue with him
moontouched
is it funnier if megatron is like a head taller or a head smaller
Quinn Angstrom
starscream kicks over statues and poses in their place
moontouched
because either is really good but shorter megatron who just fucking kicks the legs out from under starscream when he thinks he's getting too uppity is such a funny mental image
~Lamiamon~
Megatron is a tank so he comes up to about Starscream's waist
moontouched
oh my god that means he can suplex him to shut him up
moontouched
yeah this is good
moontouched
ALSO YES THE STATUE POSING
~Lamiamon~
triple changers are hard because they're all bullshit
Quinn Angstrom
a satellite cannon was mentioned and it makes me think of the idea of like
Quinn Angstrom
just this huge transformer floating in orbit, chillin
Quinn Angstrom
until megatron calls him up
moontouched
that would rule tbh
~Lamiamon~
sounds like G1 Shockwave
~Lamiamon~
whose job was basically to watch over Cybertron while Megatron was away on Earth
moontouched
i really like the idea of shockwave just being a weird satellite nobody knows what to do with and then one time he actually transforms
moontouched
and everyone is like OH FUCK THAT WAS A GUY???
moontouched
AHH SHIT
~Lamiamon~
and like, over the course of like, millions of years, he left Cybertron exactly as Megs left it
~Lamiamon~
made no ground against the remaining autobot resistance
moontouched
shockwave and soundwave synergy would be fun too, like shockwave is collecting information passively and then passing it to soundwave who actually processes it and sorts it into usable information
moontouched
you have this infosec van with a satellite connection
moontouched
thats also playing funky tunes
~Lamiamon~
G1 Shockwave is wild because he varies so much between the G1 show and the G1 comics
Quinn Angstrom
playing funky tunes... in space
moontouched
space tunes....
~Lamiamon~
in the comics, he's this bad ass who rolls up and offlines most of the cast, takes over, deposes Megatron, and only acquiesces leadership because he thinks it logical to do so
~Lamiamon~
in the cartoon
~Lamiamon~
he
~Lamiamon~
he tries
~Lamiamon~
he tries real hard
~Lamiamon~
there's a reason why most incarnations of Shockwave tend to follow the comics, with Animated being the only one who really bases himself on the cartoon one

and even then they took liberties
~Lamiamon~
https://imgs.plurk.com/QBo/KgX/IYIXigah0aTFkRYZ9wfF8mnyZ00_lg.jpg he has antlers for some reason
Quinn Angstrom
antlers improve character design. universal truth
moontouched
yeah sticking horns on something is REAL good
~Lamiamon~
https://imgs.plurk.com/QBo/R4J/q87K0bR5Z3XkZY0dRBEHSVHZU0K_lg.jpg that's why Armada Megatron is so awesome
Quinn Angstrom
damn those shoulderpads put warcraft to shame
Dirk Warhard
Armada had some extreme shoulders
Dirk Warhard
https://images.plurk.com/6iDkxd6vpOxYAKnwlK4m0x.png https://images.plurk.com/2MjFsjrfFDLvFkyhnHSCFg.png look at my stupid blorbos
~Lamiamon~
https://imgs.plurk.com/QBo/vgl/iw7dV5fvfxlPOr0P0xgW3uOpDKO_lg.jpg how can you leave Tidal Wave out of this equation
Dirk Warhard
tidal wave is not my blorbo
~Lamiamon~
still, he has some impressive shoulders
~Lamiamon~
also, hi, I never thought I'd meet another Armada fan in DWRP :0
Dirk Warhard
I could never rewatch it now but I greatly enjoyed the version I filled in in my head when I was thirteen
~Lamiamon~
Micron Legend is worth a watch if you wanna see a version of it that isn't incompetent.
Dirk Warhard
eh, there are still plenty of issues with it that wouldn't be fixed with that--character bloat, knowing what Energon does to all the characters, etc
~Lamiamon~
fair
~Lamiamon~
but then I'm used to that sorta thing with TFs, heh
▲ndrusi
the secret of transformers is transformers is always pretty cool
▲ndrusi
even when it's objectively terrible
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