This has already been a bad year.

My cat died, my friend's sister died a few weeks ago and her husband two days ago, another of our friends is in hospice (we're old, btw), and another friend and her husband (who has been her caregiver) are in dodgy health.

Oddly, Brenda's husband dying has really affected Bob. He just saw Mark at his SIL's funeral thing and saw that he wasn't in good condition (confined to a wheelchair and legs v v swollen) but this seemed sudden. Also, the way Brenda phrased it was disturbing. He "took his pain away." Bob's thinking suicide and I'm thinking just gave in.

He suffered from debilitating back pain for many years, becoming less and less mobile. It was difficult to get pain meds renewed and an upcoming surgery that might have helped (alltho' I've never heard anything good about back surgery) was delayed b/c of the edema in his legs. Also, he was diabetic.

We were all really more worried about Kathy and her husband, who live about 90 minutes from us so it's difficult to help out. And Candy is way over in Atlanta, but she has her daughter nearby.

Kathy and Marvin have no family nearby and most of their friends are in their 70s and 80s. I'd say Marvin is pushing 90 hisownself. It seems like they have made no plans for eventualities. I talked to Bob about getting in-home health care like we did for my parents. As long as they knew where they were, I thought they should stay at home.

You all are young uns, as we do say, so you don't think about such things, but you might have parents. Know what they want (DNRs, etc.), arrange for powers of attorney when the time comes, find out what's available for assistance. Don't do it all on your own if you can help it. Also, I've heard cruises are cheaper than assisted living. Go figure.

We are all set here to take care of mom. Sorry to hear about all this bad stuff in your life.

Candy, the woman in hospice, has died. This is the Worst May Ever.

Happy New Llud! :