[mute/dad/grief mention] so we've been trying to rework our kitchen and we got a table for the kitchen again that so many memories of my dad came coming back

after my dad passed away we threw away our table cause it was old and we just never got a new one for awhile and started eating in the living room

so lately we placed a table in the kitchen and idk i got hit with so many memories of him like my parents would always talk in the kitchen and many nights my dad would fall asleep at the table that i would always say good night to him before bed

he'd get sad if we just went to sleep so we'd wake him up to say good night to him

so it's weird seeing a table in the kitchen again though we're in a better place where we can talk about him and how he was always in the kitchen talking with my mom, watching her cook, saying hi to us whenever we walked in for water then going back to say good night to him

we might actually eat in the kitchen again

sometimes i think about how i don't remember much during that time idk if it's my mind trying to protect me but i remember certain events like my uncles spending nearly all night with us or my grandma helping me shop when i would just stand in the aisle staring at a bag of chips