➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
every morning i feed my lizards better than i feed myself just to have them stank face at me bc it's not what they ordered.
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
shut yo ass up and eat your crisp mixed greens, strawberries, and carrots little shits
studly boops
their eternally grumpy demeanor is part of their charm
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
studly boops
: it's true but still the amount of effort 
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
i'm not saying i'm bearded dragon gordon ramsey but i'm not not saying that lmfao
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
i have to get on a ladder to feed my most chonkiest german giant queen and she still gives me the look
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
and i'm like damn you guys are so ungrateful for anything that isn't a super worm
studly boops
they're just letting you know they expect a certain level of quality. when you give them 200%, then maybe they will show some respect
studly boops
(but probably not)
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
for such gluttonous little derps they are so disrespectful
studly boops
at least they aren't going on hunger strikes
studly boops
I used to have the most ornery frog
studly boops
"this is what I want, but it's not wiggling in the precise way I desire. I have no choice; I must starve."
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
studly boops
: they have tried that shit with me and it doesn't work lmfao
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
i will slurry them and none of them are a fan
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
i love frogs kahsfdg
(excited hiss)
I feel this feel. Sometimes Florence leaps from the sand like the mighty shai'hulud she is and gulps down her mouse.
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
they are so spectacular
(excited hiss)
...other times she needs to be bonked on the head with it.
(excited hiss)
Most recently she just lay there, her mouth open, and waited for me to basically put the mouse directly between her jaws.
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
(excited hiss)
: why are herps the novel - guest starring you two and anyone that has ever owned anything that fits
(excited hiss)
Avanc is my roommates black mexican king snake and she ...is old and senile and regularly gets into INTENSE fights with and tries to eat her own ass.
(excited hiss)
why are herps?
➴ɨռȶʀʊsɨʋɛ ȶɦօȶ
it's a good question