摘句 What would my body look like if I didn’t want affection from gay men and protection from straight men? What would my body look and feel like if I didn’t have to mold it into both a shield and an ornament? How do I love a body that was never fully my own?
To be clear, the stress on girls to be “good” far surpasses any stress men might feel to be “good.” This disparity is perhaps best exemplified by the fact that when a girl does something “wrong,” few mourn her goodness. We rarely hear, “I thought she was one of the good girls.”
(接) Women who behave “badly” are ultimately not given the same benefit of the doubt as men and are immediately cast off as bitches or sluts. Men might be written off as “dogs,” but their reckless behaviour is more often unnoticed, forgiven, or even celebrated—hence our cultural fixation with bad boys.
Unfortunately, any ambiguity or nonconformity, especially in relation to gender, conjures terror. This is precisely why men are afraid of me. Why women are afraid of me, too.
If we are invested in perpetuating and glorifying the myth of the “good man,” we are also complicit in overlooking, if not permitting, the reprehensible behavior of the “typical man.”
I'm Afraid of Men
by Vivek Shraya
「我害怕男人，因為是男人教我去畏懼『女孩』一詞，將它變成用來傷害我的武器。
我害怕男人，因為是男人教我去憎恨、最終摧毀我的女性氣質。
我害怕男人，因為是男人教我去害怕我自己最美好的那些部分。」
這是一本由跨性別女作者Vivek Shraya所寫的一本回憶錄，藉由描述她與男人相處的各個創傷經歷，討論現在社會對男性氣質(masculinity)與性別的概念。短短的一本書，我覺得非常值得花一點時間，讀讀作者親身的體悟，思考自己既有的想法是否應該改變。
讀嘛讀嘛
我其實在滿久以前就聽過一些booktubers或評論提到這本書，但是直到前一陣子Trans Awareness Week我看到許多書單分享/介紹，才真的吸引到我的目光，(這本也在我之前那一噗跨性別書單有提到)，剛好我也想多讀一些Non-fiction，就找了這本來讀。這是一本很短的書(有聲書不到兩小時)，但我反覆聽了大概三遍有，我覺得這是一本很值得花時間慢慢體會的書，不只是那些作者親身的經驗，那些關於性別(尤其男人)的討論更是值得深思。
I'm Afraid of Men是一本值得多讀幾次的書，透過作者分享自己的經歷與想法，重新思考自己的既有想法，挑戰社會的傳統價值。
兩部影片推薦給大家看看，第一部是作者的訪談，第二個是我很喜歡對這本書的討論影片~
What would my body look like if I didn’t want affection from gay men and protection from straight men? What would my body look and feel like if I didn’t have to mold it into both a shield and an ornament?
How do I love a body that was never fully my own?