[amid evil] now that I have a computer that can run this I can say with confidence that this game owns

the run speed is like 90 mph so you're NYOOMing all over the place exploding guys with swords that shoot laser beams

there's a weapon that's a morning star that shoots big crystal shards that staple dudes to the wall when it kills them

also a weapon that throws PLANETS

and the planets EXPLODE

it's rad