ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
"james buchanan barnes" is such a weird name
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
like, I am aware of the nineteenth-early twentieth century tradition of naming babies after presidents
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
but usually they were either good/famous presidents: jefferson, washington, jackson, &c
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
or the president at the time the child was born
6LilacMimeLions
i mean...he could have been james polk barnes
6LilacMimeLions
so it could be worse
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
polk was a better president than buchanan
𝔟𝔞𝔫𝔦𝔰𝔥𝔢𝔡 🦇
james van buren barnes
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
like, grover clevleand alexander, woody strode
6LilacMimeLions
i mean, a slightly rotten tomato would have been a better president, but "buchanan" works better than "polk" in the name
wolfgirl winter
I really have always wanted to have a character yell at him that james buchanan was a terrible president
wolfgirl winter
but I've never had the chance
Megan
the totally heterosexual bachelor president
Megan
also he could have been
Megan
chester arthur barnes
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
even though grover cleveland was a forgettable president old pete alexander was born in 1887, so it makes sense
wolfgirl winter
madison is the obvious james
Megan
tbh he could've been woodrow wilson barnes
wolfgirl winter
james madison barnes
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
the real reason for james buchanan is because he was bucky barnes before they retroactively gave him the james buchanan name decades later
ᘜᖇค८꒐ꏂ ✨
as my favorite presidential book put it: "james buchanan had the build of a fighter and the spirit of a bed wetter"
wolfgirl winter
but then he'd be maddie, which is a common girls name now, and he'd have an even harder time adjusting
ᘜᖇค८꒐ꏂ ✨
a great namesake
Megan
flawless
wolfgirl winter
it would have been cool if our most gay president were not also terrible
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
that's an opening for a mayor pete joke right there
vex appeal
I like to believe, in my heart, that like... his mother's maiden name was Buchanan so it's all just a ridiculous coincidence. Because who would name a child after James Buchanan.
wolfgirl winter
I couldn't think of one bc he would also be bad
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
anyway, they further retroactively established that bucky's dad was also james buchanan barnes
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
so, no, wrong, that doesn't work
Megan
gonna hold fundraisers in his wine cave
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i mean it does make more sense, but then, ??? there's no way bucky's dad was born in the 1850s
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
the only time period it would ever make sense to name your kid after james buchanan
ᘜᖇค८꒐ꏂ ✨
maybe he could hear through walls too
wolfgirl winter
it's probably a family name from someone who was born in the 1850s
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
marvel could have avoided this if they just went with the early aughts idea that his name was michael
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and everyone just called him bucky, because it was the 1940s, i guess
Megan
that's what you call chipper twinks
wolfgirl winter
it's just really funny that a captain america has the name of a terrible president
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
another strange saga is the steven "grant" rogers saga
Megan
a captain america also has the name of uncle sam LOOK I'M JUST SAYING
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
where grant is not his middle name
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
but he was brainwashed once to make him think it was his middle name
wolfgirl winter
the............grant thing.............
wolfgirl winter
does sam have niblings tho
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
but then the mcu made his middle name grant, further confusing everyone
wolfgirl winter
someone should give him some
Megan
I think he might in comics but I'm not totally sure
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in conclusion: if bucky were going to have a presidential name that made sense, it would be calvin coolidge barnes
Megan
OH RIGHT comicsbucky
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
comics bucky has a sister named becky because of course he does
Megan
(I was like "what why not wilson")
Megan
(and then I remembered that 616 is younger)
Megan
becky barnes is also lesbian!girl!bucky
Megan
in the peggycapverse
wolfgirl winter
IT SEEMS LIKE early presidents were popular, there are a lot more midcentury george washingtons than calvin coolidges
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
jackie roosevelt robinson was born in 1919 a month after teddy died so i guess there are more options, but jeez
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
yes, as i said, the tradition is either
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
— famous heroic presidents, with the idea that giving a child a great name will give them a great future
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
this also goes back to the revolutionary days, as a way of stressing the virtues of the american identity (and proving such a thing existed)
Megan
...can you imagine babies named donald trump lastname
wolfgirl winter
god there probably are some bc his followers are batshit
Megan
RIGHT
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— presidents at the time the babies were born (usually around election year)
wolfgirl winter
the flipside of that is cats named purrack obama or hillary kitten
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
or immediately after… wouldn't be surprised to learn of a babies named john kennedy born in the months after the assassination
Megan
oh my god I want to name a cat purrack obama now
wolfgirl winter
I think there were a fair amount of john kennedy babies, or least multiple scifi authors really wanted us to believe so
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
the one good thing about "james buchanan barnes" as a name is that famous assassins always have three names like that, so
wolfgirl winter
oh someone should tell him it's a serial killer name
wolfgirl winter
I hope it comes up in the falcom/winter soldier show
Megan
poor czolgosz, doomed to languish in obscurity
wolfgirl winter
aka 'too many caps'
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
man i've never cared to comb through and pin down the first appearance of the "james buchanan barnes" name
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
was it the 90s? was it edgy 90s foreshadowing?
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
no it was at least around c. the first ohotmu book of the dead
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
maybe it was invaders?
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
that would explain a lot, tbh.
ᴇᴍᴀɴᴀᴛᴏʀ
invaders, here to ruin everything
wolfgirl winter
it's hard to imagine bucky with a normal name
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
more like, "invaders, here to retcon things in a very specific way"
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
his name is bucky
wolfgirl winter
it has to be short for something embarrassing
wolfgirl winter
like, buckingham could work
wolfgirl winter
buckingham b. barnes
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
invaders was the comic where, in order to explain a previous avengers comic where a time-travelling namor was wearing a historically inaccurate swimsuit
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
roy thomas devised a whole plotline to explain the inaccurate swimsuit by having a supervillain kidnap namor and replace his fishpanties
wolfgirl winter
ah yes namor, famous for knowing and caring about terrestrial fashions
wolfgirl winter
p sure the answer to why is namor wearing that is always just it's namor
wolfgirl winter
he wears what he wants
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
the problem was in this avengers issue namor was wearing his 1941 costume instead of his 1943 costume, which, btw, were both panties
wolfgirl winter
Megan
welp
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
which is to say: invaders was very good at explaining things so that they were more confusing
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
at NO POINT does Invaders ever explain why everyone has 70s hairstyles even though it takes place in the 40s
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
they said, I think, that they wanted to do research on namor's fishpanties
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which were obviously USED
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
but then later he uses them as the flag of his ship??
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
Megan
namor's used fishpanties
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this is still canon
Megan
somewhere out there that fits someone's very specific kink
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
roy thomas's kink was continuity
go rimbaud
god we really did have the worst presidents just before and after the civil war huh
go rimbaud
when you think about it, does lincoln get so much credit because when you're preceded by buchanan and followed by johnson there's very little you have to do to be the best president of your era
wolfgirl winter
I mean he won the civil war,
wolfgirl winter
he also did pick johnson for vp as if have a border state democrat vice president was really going to accomplish anything in 1864
go rimbaud
it sure accomplished plenty after he died, but none of it was good
wolfgirl winter
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
grant is underrated
wolfgirl winter
tru
Lassarina
corbieclook: so I have a friend who has a cat named Barack Opawma, Purresident
Lassarina
But also and more on topic for this plurk for several generations my family was So Very Fucking New England that the eldest son - in fact up to my father's grandfather - was always named Benjamin Franklin [surname]
Lassarina
Dad got to dodge that bullet thankfully
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
yikes
ᚠᚱᛖᛃᚨ
though ben franklin rejected new england, so how new england could he be??