i cant tell how much (or how far) i've been shaped these past years. do i already sharp enough? idk.
what i can tell was those things never been easy. the struggle was real. sometimes made me cry in silent.

and now idk how many things i must go through before eternal joy comes.
the question: is that possible? the eternal joy?

sometimes i feel like this burden is just too much or too heavy. in the other hand, i have to keep strong, and stand, and lift my face up.

that's never easy indeed. but what choices do i have?
abandoning them? seems legit but, naah.. nggak sampe hati gue.

is it normal if sometimes i wanna cry so badly? i mean, just because of all these?

oh dont worry, im not only struggling over the events, but also dealing with those conservative, possessive, and controlling ego of my family.
kadang jadi kambing congek enak juga kali ya.