and the Nine of Swords in the middle is a card of terror and nightmares - and it's not a card about either overcoming or succumbing but like, acknowledgement
yes, this thing is terrifying - or just painful. the nine of swords can also be sorrow, and this one leans into that - the fallen lamb, the ravens, the angel coming to the crying ewe
so I think this reading is like: fear and sorrow and grief are real, but they're part of life and not some separate space that bars you from it; breathe deep and rise and go forward
the Six in terms of past joy and nostalgia, the Two about loving, trusting, supportive relations with other people (in this case, I think especially your daughters). joys old and new, friends old and new
the 4 is a card of material security and it usually reads as a warning against greed, against hoarding, but for you it feels to me like - you've been through so much privation, but in the last few years, finally getting some of the payments y'all were always owed, Bad Aunt leaving the household and so on, things have improved, and I think this reading
is sort of saying, like...let yourself find those old joys and trust in those strengthening bonds as the spawn become independent adults who relate to you in new ways
I don't believe in this stuff at all, and yet you and
FʀɪᴇɴᴅIɴYᴇʟʟᴏᴡ
always manage to use these readings to tell me something that I know but don't let myself believe, or need to know
it's the silliest comparison in the world, but recently I was watching an improv comedy show, and one of the prompts was like "film students go apeshit theorizing about a water bottle that was left in the shot accidentally"
and I realized that for me Tarot is kind of like that - taking random chance and letting the pretentious Film Crit Kid in my head just go ham on a bunch of rich storied symbols, guided by empathy
and I think there's a lot of value in that. letting ourselves think deeply and symbolically about the big things with a few touchpoints to find a direction
as a side note, when I went to try and shuffle the deck, which is a little big for my hands, these three cards popped right out of the middle. which I always take as a sign BECAUSE WE'RE LEANING IN
anyway, we've got really strong both feminine and masculine energy, from the Empress (delicious, abundant, easy to cultivate ad nurture) and the Emperor (impossible to cultivate, much sought after, large and powerful, laws and guards often get involved when they're found growing wild) leading into the powerful action of the 8 of Wands
which feels to me like it's saying, not that the Empress and Emperor are in conflict, but that you need to bring your whole self to the endeavor facing you
the legends around Witch's Butter say that it's residue left by witches after casting a hex or a smell, and you can remove the spell by poking a hole in the fungus to dehydrate it - or reactivate its power by hydrating it again
this deck emphasizes the waking aspect of it - a situation has been building for a long time, and now it's time to See the Truth of what's going on and face it, and the other two cards follow on from there
action and drive but also a little bit not knowing what you're doing. i've heard some people call it the adhd card. our page has got his walking boots and his flaming staff and he's ready to go!!! go where?? well, uh -
So overall I think this is saying: don't be daunted. there's a lot!!! you might feel scattered by you have the energy you need to make a start, and figuring this out will be worth it
WHICH LIKE. almost annoyingly straightforward, as a journey from being kind of a passenger in his own life, in turbulent waters full of pirahnas, through the card of maybe-overwhelming choices, to the card of intuition
Ace of Coins more typically is about a new chance for support and growth - here, reversed, not merely missed but lost, maybe taken away through absolutely no fault of yours. a door closed
and the 4 of Cups, also reversed here, is usually a card about being bored with success, stagnating a little, maybe the urge to move on when something that was once satisfying no longer is
the way I read it, I think this is saying - woof, there's been some ups and downs, huhn? maybe this is a good time to really think about what success would mean to you, what would actually make you feel, not just superior, like you were winning the right points, but like you were on the road to your best life.
nevertheless!!! we've got Five of Crystals, The Ladybug (Five of Pentacles), the Four of Shells, the Crane (Four of Cups), and the Knight of Crystals, the Camel (Knight of Pentacles)
which, traditionally, the Fives are often kind of a 'dark turn' crisis midpoint of the suits, and the Five of Pentacles is typically about poverty, loss, lack of support, and the Four of Cups, as mentioned above, as being about kind of stagnating in what looks from the outside like success
where the Ladybug is for illuminating a path through times of stress and worry, and the Crane is about patience, keen eyes, re-evaluation and re-discovery
the Knights are all about momentum, an active agent bringing the suit forth, but for crystals/pentacles, associated with prosperity, it's a little steadier, building something to last, and the camel leans into that, is about determination and endurance. a very "rome wasn't built in a day" card
Misty is reeling a little bit! she's maybe been kind of Getting By for a while as a warden, and Walter's Whole Thing has proved that she doesn't have the kind of support she maybe thought she had there. and that sucks!!! but she has the strength and resilience to move through this moment out of the shock and also out of the rut she was maybe in a little bit
something big has changed - maybe external, maybe only internal, but it's okay to not know how to deal with the New Normal right away. it's okay to take some time for it
and then the page of cups which is usually a very like, volatile card, a card of Youth and Emotion and Creativity and everything being all loosey goosey
aaaaa i love all of these; they're all so fitting (including mine; i did the request and hopped offline immediately for a couple hours but damn that really is my life rn lol)
the magician is a card of mastery of all 4 elements, of knowledge and drive and passion and properity, but also is about juggling and balancing everything needed for the work. the 9 of wands is about earning rest after long and difficult journeys, needing and taking it, and the 4 of swords is about pausing and sleeping and healing
working until you drop will not actually fix the thing where you miss your family. it's okay to feel that and you're allowed to sleep in when you've died with no four year olds who need breakfast
gonna actually start in the middle though because "the hanged man never intends to be hanged by his foot. space bubble cat didn't PLAN on being in a bubble...in reverse, the impatience is oft too fuckin much. we don't want to be held up like this"
in the alleyman deck, this four of swords goes into a little more of a psychological meaning - sometimes we seek sanctuary from our own self-doubts, sometimes we isolate or don't try as a way to protect ourselves, but it's us imposing our own fears on what's possible
you might be about to step off a cliff, but you've can't hang out on the precipice forever, you've got to take a step, and it's worth embracing the naive, to renew as the world renews
and I think this reading is kind of showing two paths for sweeney - he can retreat into that self doubt, that old fearful "it's been so long and I'll never get it" feeling, or he can embrace "who the hell knows how this works" and take that blind leap
and it's so easy to see him being flighty and flirty and hedonist and not think of him in those terms at all, to see his problems as all as addiction and hedonism and self-destruction and bad taste in men....but also...like...Sex Work is Work
so much of why he's burnt out and self-medicating and has the self-worth and addiction issues that he does is because he's had a literal nightmare boss for decades who's exploited him and made him literally work like hell
seize the means of production! seize the camera! do the work that excites YOU - doing things that feel meaningful, having agency and concrete victories, is just as important on his path as the more internal nebulous parts of personal growth, and he's going to need both
Missed a lot of readings abdomen scrolling through now, but these decks are really so gorgeous. (lol, everyone needs a rest on the Barge, that tracks.)
Jay
: funny enough there's a significant number of readers who don't see anything mystical about it so much as letting the random chance and the symbols make you think about things you might not have thought of, literally acting as a second opinion to make you more easily think through your own. A little like how tossing a coin makes you suddenly know
there's some really interesting visual symmetry here, with Strength and the 8 of Pentacles both on solid ground, and the King of Cups between them, upended with his head in the clouds
and then you have Strength, a card of spiritual endurance and resilience and holding-on, moving-through, and the 8 of Pentacles, a card of care and craft and good work
I'm not sure if the turmoil from the King is something you're currently dealing with, or something coming your way (maybe just Holiday Morbs, I know those can get you) but this reading is saying that you have the inner strength to get through it to the other side, like you have so many times before
Strength and the Hanged Man both speak to his struggles with his graduation journey, I think - he's been trying, he's been enduring, he can put up with anything he needs to but what is it getting him
and I think for Sebastian, I think the cats wailing at the moon here are like....acknowleding those inner doubts, but also showing a more nontraditional path
it's not a card of pain or loss or sacrifice, OR a card of victory and virtue. it's the changeable-unchanging moon, that appears to change but also doesn't
and I think for Sebastian, it's less that he has to change fundamental things about himself that feel impossible to change, as that he has to write himself a new role in the story
And I don't remember the exact deck and cards he got the first time you did a reading for him, but I remember it was a miserable-looking deck with a miserable reading... so that's a nice change.
Name: ✿ ✿ Fuzzbox ✿ ✿ :3