brainstew spoilers for as above, so below
๐ Shauntae ๐
brainstew spoilers for as above, so below
brainstew spoilers for as above, so below
๐ Shauntae ๐
I have a mammogram today.
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Which I would be fine with if my period hadn't started. I woke up to underwear full of blood.
๐ Shauntae ๐
I have cramps AND achy tits.
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And the Midol refuses to kick in!
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Whatever, I'm going to get this shit done today.
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Then next month I have my pap smear.
๐ Shauntae ๐
Oof. These cramps are being fucking evil.
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I'm rescheduling this shit.
๐ Shauntae ๐
at least the rent is free
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used my cramp time writing.
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Dirty Donna - Episode 1
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I WANT TO TALK TO THIS CREATOR.
๐ Shauntae ๐
like their shit is hilarious and off-putting.
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I have watched three horror movies so far for this month. On a scale of 1 to 5 Jack-o-lanterns, here's the verdict so far.
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I SAW THE TV GLOW ๐๐๐๐
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BONE TOMAHAWK ๐๐๐๐
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AS ABOVE, SO BELOW ๐๐๐
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Bone Tomahawk has a gnarly kill that made me go YOOOO.
๐ Shauntae ๐
I liked As Above, So Below. I wish the ending was meaner.
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I DIDN'T HATE THE CHARACTERS. I JUST WANTED MORE DEATH.
THE SHUNT
i liked as above so below in part BCUZ it has so much wasted potential. also hated the templar shit lol SURELY THERE WAS SOME OTHER WAY. ALSO NEEDED A MEANER ENDING
THE SHUNT
finally read rent is free also!!!!! I AM INTRIGUED. also Pumpkinhead so underrated
๐ Shauntae ๐
THE SHUNT
: I get the surviving trio will carry that trauma of surviving Hell. I didn't feel it for the two white leads.
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The other survivor conveyed "fucked up by this shit" better with how he wanders off.
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Incantation and Noroi possibly raised my found footage horror expectations too high.
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I still love the ending of Incantation.
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The curse can't be lifted. It has to be shared to save the little girl.
THE SHUNT
Incantation set an insanely high bar
THE SHUNT
i was enjoying it the whole time but when it curses YOU by using the ghosting effect with bright light.... cinema
๐ Shauntae ๐
Someone told Alan the new Salem's Lot movie is a banger. Oh no.
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THE SHUNT
: Pumpkinhead is a great creature feature cursed by some horrible sequels.
๐ Shauntae ๐
With "At Least the Rent is Free" I'm trying to capture the insane levels of stupid cruelty I've seen online.
๐ Shauntae ๐
The parasocial shit people say.
THE SHUNT
๐ Shauntae ๐
: i couldn't make it 10mins into salems lot what kind of maniac wasnt repulsed by the netflix true crime opening and horrendous acting??????
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THE SHUNT
: alan really wants to watch it thanks to his friend's recommendation. i said i'll watch it with him on tuesday.
THE SHUNT
oh man lol i guess ill try to watch it to compare notes. maybe it starts to slap or something??? JUST DOESNT SEEM POSSIBLE
๐ Shauntae ๐
I HAVE BEEN READING AND WATCHING SOME DECENT HORROR LATELY SO I MIGHT NOT SURVIVE IF IT'S FUCKING AWFUL.
๐ Shauntae ๐
Ugh bloodwork tomorrow.
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I'm watching IN A VIOLENT NATURE
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and there is a cancel culture joke. rip.
๐ Shauntae ๐
Ah. The socially aware lesbian gets the worst death so far. Okay.
๐ Shauntae ๐
It was nice to see the death was a practical effect.
THE SHUNT
came to report back on salems lot but in a violent nature was such a huge disappointment
THE SHUNT
here is my review of salems lot: chat gpt take the full text of this book and turn it into 99% scenes that should have been on the cutting room floor and dont show most key moments on screen at all so it seems like people just magically acquire knowledge.
THE SHUNT
also make sure the direction the actors get for every scene is that it should feel like no one knows what the end of the scene is and they just stand around awkwardly saying lines until they're told to stop
THE SHUNT
that movie was heinous how on earth could a human being on earth think it was good
THE SHUNT
it was a cinematic crime like i cant even put into words how bad it is. they spent all their money on the cool glowy eyeball effect i guess
๐ Shauntae ๐
THE SHUNT
: I understood what IN A VIOLENT NATURE was going for, a slow cinema take on the slasher genre focused on the POV of the slasher. Okay. Cool. Beautiful shots of the Ontario wilderness. Love it.
๐ Shauntae ๐
But then it played the worst tropes of slashers straight and I sighed.
๐ Shauntae ๐
The blonde queer girl gets the most over the top death while the shitty guy who resurrected the killer gets... his head splattered by a rock.
THE SHUNT
yeah it totally lost me with that shit. ALSO THE CHOICE TO SHOW LIKE... A WEIRD 2$ AFTER EFFECTS VISION OF THE PAST. WHY
THE SHUNT
it totally squandered its great premise
๐ Shauntae ๐
I HATE THEY DID THAT.
๐ Shauntae ๐
They didn't need to show Johnny's dad in the mirror!
THE SHUNT
I DONT NEED TO KNOW THAT INFO. ITS HEAVILY IMPLIED. ALSO NOT EVEN NECESSARY???
๐ Shauntae ๐
YEAH!
THE SHUNT
why take a show dont tell premise and never miss a moment to tell me shit
๐ Shauntae ๐
We know the pendant is important already because JOHNNY CRAWLS OUT OF THE DIRTY RIGHT AFTER IT WAS TAKEN.
๐ Shauntae ๐
The dialogue drove me nuts at points.
๐ Shauntae ๐
I get that what it was doing! But also, do it better!
THE SHUNT
TOTALLY WASTED A SUPER COOL CONCEPT
THE SHUNT
tbh salems lot does this also. you could definitely improve on that story especially in a modern context but chat gpt just streamlined it into a humid fart
๐ Shauntae ๐
There was a scene I did love of Johnny playing with the toy car keychain.
๐ Shauntae ๐
Then he snaps back into murder mode when he hears the douche mock the other guy for losing his dad. I liked that!
๐ Shauntae ๐
But then... the dude gets a flat death.
๐ Shauntae ๐
THE SHUNT
: OH BOY. I WILL BE SITTING THROUGH THAT SOON.
๐ Shauntae ๐
Giving IN A VIOLENT NATURE ๐๐
THE SHUNT
๐ Shauntae ๐
I am a sucker for beautiful nature shots and the scene with the toy car almost saved it for me, but then it went back to annoying me.
THE SHUNT
they had me on board so many times only to blow it over and over
THE SHUNT
at least a human person wrote in a violent nature, salems lot seems like it was written and directed by an ipad in a trenchcoat
๐ Shauntae ๐
I'm going to die.
๐ Shauntae ๐
I SAW THE TV GLOW moves slow and has a dream like direction like IN A VIOLENT NATURE, but it did it better.
๐ Shauntae ๐
It helps that I SAW THE TV GLOW trusts the audience to figure out what the movie is about without being directly told.
๐ Shauntae ๐
Though, I did see cishet people Not Getting It in some reviews.
๐ Shauntae ๐
BONE TOMAHAWK has a good cast, and a man gets butchered taint first.
๐ Shauntae ๐
If I don't pick a banger horror movie today, I shall scream.