god. i really am butch huh.

reading stone butch blues to not be a hypocrite and it is Hitting Hard

i feel like i've been consistently on the verge of tears my entire time reading this

IT'S LIKE. i don't know. it never really stuck how important it is that we can just wear jeans and that's fine. wear button-ups tucked into jeans or slacks and sneakers without anyone batting an eyelash. that kind of freedom. no one's ever given us any crap for not shaving. that kind of freedom.

the kind of strength zie talks about as a butch speaks to me SO damn strongly. it makes my heart heavy. that's the sort of thing i want to embody.

In that one moment I knew you really did understand how I felt in life. Choking on anger, feeling so powerless, unable to protect myself or those I loved most, yet fighting back again and again, unwilling to give up. I didn’t have the words to tell you this then. I just said, “It’ll be OK, it’ll be alright.”

SHOVES MY FACE IN A PILLOW AND SCREAMS

Strong to my enemies, tender to those I loved and respected. That’s what I wanted to be. Soon I would have to put these qualities to the test. But for the moment, I was happy.

lays on the floor .