I'm honestly laying here trying to figure out how I haven't just straight up mentally shattered yet

not with just the last two months but how have I even survived the last ten years

just occurring to me now I should have completely lost my fucking mind and melted into nothing but I'm still here. how

like I thought cancer would've broke me at least but I'm just sitting here. and I can't even tell if it's strength or just complete and utter commitment to disconnecting from suffering when necessary and I don't know if that is strength

is it true mental fortitude or am I fooling myself

we just don't know

sleepy thoughts

When you've said "Not Today, Satan" often enough that you're left baffled at how you've survived? A mood

power beyond your own knowledge

Being able to disconnect is a survival mechanism and survival is being strong so. Yes.

Whatever gets you to another tomorrow is a good thing