also, Breach CR Meme because i forgot to link it last night
shobogan
also, Breach CR Meme because i forgot to link it last night
also, Breach CR Meme because i forgot to link it last night
Mouth Powers
are you on discord at all? would love to chat about the longer arc/end of their breach relationship as well
Mouth Powers
or we could just chat here if you are not
shobogan
i am not! discord hates me. but v much up to chatting here, yes
Mouth Powers
high-angst option: together for a few years before Taylor dies and then Jedao climbs into a deep grief pit and pushes him away and it's Extremely Sad and Terrible
shobogan
oh NO
shobogan
i love it 
Mouth Powers
lol I was trying to think of other options but
shobogan
zerxus really would have no idea how to cope with it
Mouth Powers
I think there would ultimately be a clash between Z wanting very much to stick with him through it but being angry about Jedao trying so hard not to let him
shobogan
yeah, i can definitely see him getting very frustrated
shobogan
(...meanwhile back to himself on the barge, remembering he did Exactly That to Literally Everyone after losing evandrin)
Mouth Powers
and Jedao feeling like...he only has so much left in him that's any kind of person goodness and his priorities re 1) the twins 2) the Show™ 3) no more left for zerxus sorry bye
Mouth Powers
(he doesn't WANT to be caught safely when his baby sister fell)
Mouth Powers
and like, Z getting pissed at him with that very heady mix of arrogant and accurate that they both do and it's like YOU ARE WALLOWING and Jedao probably says some wildly unforgivable things in return and Z is still being stubborn about it
Mouth Powers
until jedao just breaks down in silent tears and whispers "i'm so tired of being terrible to you. but i don't have anything else. please just go"
shobogan
shobogan
he's too perceptive not to see the exact moment all the fight goes out of zerxus and he feels like he's failed
Mouth Powers
I feel like there's a good 6 months to a year where Jedao is like...he's there for his little brothers, and he's as light in the air as ever and beaming smiles on stage, and at all other times he's just curled up in his own trailer doing the literally nothing depression naps, and it's extremely jarring
Mouth Powers
because Z knows he's still doing terribly because Jedao has always been so social...but he only sees him when he's still smiling
shobogan
god, and he wants to say something but
shobogan
there's this gulf between them now that he doesn't quite know how to traverse, not without hurting them both all over again
Mouth Powers
and eventually he comes back to being a person but...yeah
shobogan
zerxus at least gets to be deeply relieved at a distance
Mouth Powers
jedao knows he's hurt Zerxus and he deserved so much better but he has no idea how to address it
shobogan
and zerxus wants to tell him that yes, it was painful, but that doesn't mean he regrets it
shobogan
but he has no idea how to start that conversation
Mouth Powers
I think maybe Neal was his first relationship after that - someone new to the circus entirely, something light and sweet and fun that ended up just drifting apart because he wasn't ready to risk anything more real at that point
shobogan
yeah that makes a lot of sense
yeah that makes a lot of sense
Mouth Powers
I think like, five years later when zerxus is with neal, Jedao would finally reach out about it
Mouth Powers
like. it's safer to apologize when there's no chance of trying to fix things that he knows aren't really fixable
shobogan
and zerxus can finally forgive him out loud which is very helpful
Mouth Powers
also it's like very earnest but also kind of a terrible apology because it's like
Mouth Powers
I'm sorry I hurt you and you absolutely didn't deserve that
Mouth Powers
(but also I was not capable of anything else that IS why I tried to break up >_> )
shobogan
lmao, jedao
shobogan
zerxus like, i still forgive you, but you should maybe think about this
shobogan
because you deserve to be happy with someone
Mouth Powers
he is sorry he didn't know how to...let himself be loved in that state
Mouth Powers
anyway they probably get a little drunk about it and hug very hard
shobogan
YEP