and I went from laughing to being pissed off because at last count I'm the one spending $$$ to get there. I got us the hotel. I booked the pets with a sitter. I bought MY outfit and my MOM'S outfit
My aunt is also flipping out. She had a gorgeous outfit. She tried it on in front of my most stylish and up-to-date cousins who gave their seal of approval (already hard to get). She tried it in front of her son, the groom. Approval.
Meanwhile I'm in tears because I don't even know if I can make it up there. I freaked out at my mom over the phone saying "I don't care, I don't care, I just want to heal, stop giving me shit to do" over and over until I had a panic attack
My mom keeps changing the hotel arrangements. I got a hotel room (for ME for the wheelchair if I NEED IT) and an air bnb on the offchance I could do it
Mom wants a bathroom to herself. So she told my aunt she was taking the hotel room by herself and me, my brother, and my husband are sharing the air bnb
Not my mom. Not my aunts. Not my cousins. Not my brother, not my husband, no one. I just want to focus on getting my leg back in working order. Everyone go piss off.
and she would handle it. Something I wish she would have done in the beginning but I told her "everyone needs to stop Bad News Bearing me and the fucking off to parts unknown because I don't have the benefit of getting outside and releasing my feelings, I am stuck in one room without sunlight."
1. This is toxic af, and you need an air bnb to finish healing and only tell hubs where you are. 2. Tell your mom to say fuck you and wear the fucking fabulous pretty dress
okay 1. unless you are in the wedding party, why the fuck does the bride get to care if your dress is "formal enough" unless like you're being a dick and wearing gym shorts and a tank top on purpose or something. that's unreasonable and dumb. 2. take care of yourself, honey. "I cannot walk" is a pretty damn good reason to not go to a wedding
I might just reach out to my cousin who's the groom and go "hey I checked the venue out online and I can't get a wheelchair down there/can't manipulate crutches on grass. I'mma hang in the barn because it looks like the road to that is paved"
that dress you got your mom is GORGEOUS, and I suggest skipping out on the whole thing and getting yourself a week in a wheelchair accessible air bnb somewhere nice away from all these assholes instead >.<
Not that the field doesn’t look lovely. It’s very nice looking field. But you cannot expect people to be decked out in formal attire that you would see at the fucking plaza or something in a fucking field.
bridesmaid tumbling down the hill because she foolishly wore heels would admittedly have been a little funny after the fact, but it would have hurt first.
you couldn't pay me to attend the wedding of a cousin (I have 3 married cousins, went to zero weddings) let alone one determined to make every guest's life a living hell
I just looked up pictures from that wedding, and they're a little surreal because I was super thin with long hair and no glasses, but more importantly, look how bad these shoes were for an outdoor wedding!!!
(to be fair to my friend, she didn't choose the shoes, only told me to buy silver ones, but she also didn't give me a full venue description before I bought them)
Bridezilla is not a mysterious phenomenon that happens to perfectly normal, nice people. Bridezilla is what happens when people excuse your shitty behavior because you're getting married
I'm gonna float the idea to my mom that the place isn't wheelchair accessible but the reception is. I half expect everyone to flip out at me because they'll probably be taking pictures out there too
It's 100% okay to not attend for that reason. Imagine if your wheelchair tips over, or you fall with the crutches - if unlucky, that'll mess with the healing process.
(As someone who sometimes went "bah, I can hop one-legged this short distance" and twice ended up stepping down on my broken leg - luckily I was at least in a boot - the pain of doing so is brutal.)
I say this with exactly as much respect as she is due. Fuck her vision. She can set some parameters, she can’t take away free will. This goes way beyond making sure no one shows up in jeans and crocs.
2. Tell your mom to say fuck you and wear the fucking fabulous pretty dress
2. take care of yourself, honey. "I cannot walk" is a pretty damn good reason to not go to a wedding