let’s play a game; guess what singer this YouTube comment that made me spittake-laugh is about

adam levine

(I don't know anything about the guy I just know a coworker was playing one of his songs and it was annoying me. sorry, coworker.)

adam levine is funny as hell to me because he built his brand around making this slick seductive lite-funk adult-contemporary rock, his brand being an absolute too-smooth lothario

and then he got caught cheating on his supermodel wife/fiancée and he texts like the most pathetically desperate basic bro

emo SpongeBob... ...just trying to think of guys with high voices, the dude from Coheed & Cambria?

oh his pregnant model wife

oh C&C is a good guess

THIS is where "that body of yours is absurd" is from?

Aғᴛᴇʀᴍᴀᴛʜ Cᴀᴛ : gdksldjdjksuehdndkdj i missed that detail oh my god

yeah she's currently making their 3rd child

(And, as she's a supermodel, she still looks damn good tbh)

okay hang on which dirtbag guy was it who addressed their affair partner as "alive girl"

wait NVM I looked it up. fuckin Bezos

hahaha what

did they learn their game from an AI generator. an algorithm.

some dudes are bad at texting!

also he owes me $750 and, apparently, once stuck my dad's neighbor with a lunch bill for his whole Rich Guy Entourage and can't take a joke about it

BUT ENOUGH ABOUT MY JEFF BEZOS GRUDGE

well bezos is a loser, we knew that tbh

wait Dack come back who was emo SpongeBob

yeah I've been waiting in suspense

‘twas billy corgan

smashing pumpkins frontman billy corgan?

yyyep

...you know what

it was not on a video for an official SP video or anything, it was on a Neil Circiega mashup

???

incredible

yeah, i can see it