vyng has spent the past 7 or so months processing the loss of his ability to change into animals: what led to it, the trauma of it, his grief, and the ongoing self-loathing that all those things triggered
as he develops a stronger body, more self-awareness and a broader perspective (that comes from talking to to other sleepers), his elemental powers are also evolving
in april, he was forced to confront the physical embodiment of his self-loathing and learn to share a space with it. those threads are still playing out (TY to everyone who's tagged into that TL, btw ) but just having other people see and interact with it and not freak the fuck out has been super-helpful for him
Between that, forcing himself to meditate next to it at the Salt Lake, and learning that a person can dissipate their own Tether by showing it compassion and kindness...
I think the main takeaway for Vyng is: He needs to acknowledge that his self-loathing stems from a shitty childhood with a father who made him feel like love is inherently conditional :/
Breaking from that means learning to question those feelings...instead of letting them define his self-worth. And that begins by simply being like, "hey, this is part of me that I carry because of this awful thing that happened in my family"
there's a lot of layers to that choice (and valid reasons for choosing to step away from it, tbh). but it was partly driven by that self-loathing......and it's precisely that self-loathing that's made it difficult for him to process the trauma of losing it
But now that he's aware it's a blocker (and February forced him to admit that, actually, he is grieving that loss), I think he's started to gain more clarity in general
He knows this is basically gonna be an ongoing conversation he has with himself, possibly for the rest of his life. Where he faces those darker parts of himself and learns to co-exist with it, instead of going down these self-destructive paths that end up hurting his relationships
there's some meta involved with that (mainly in his relationship with the arctic char and the different things it represents), but tl;dr......is he got good at using his gills. because he's learning not to hate himself as much as he used to
AT THE SAME TIME, his research with Orpheus, watching his buddy turn into a terrifying bird in March, and then his own close-brush with beasthood in April has reaffirmed the importance he places on connections. not just to nature, but to people also
So! at some point vyng, tuck and billie will be doing that familial blood pact, and it's not gonna cause him as much stress afterward as it could have under different circumstances. 'Cause he knows this is the best thing for himself and his family, and he'll handle whatever happens in the future when it happens
Going forward, he'll likely be experimenting with ways to integrate his shapeshifting stuff with his elementalism (maybe channeling animals into the elements themselves??) but that's probably a ways away
it'd be cool if he eventually realized that his shapeshifting bonds aren't as broken as he thinks they are. but i think the only person who might have evidence of that is obi-wan, and it's never come up in convo
In the near-term, I feel like vyng's earned a break from all this intense introspection, and wanna throw him into other people's plots a little more aggressively
ezra's met Cloudpiercer, which is something only a small handful of CR has done. Vyng might encourage them to be friends once he realizes Ezra has the ability to share feelings/impressions/ideas with animals
but yeah, feeling pretty good over all about vyng's in-game trajectory. i love all his CR, too, and will be glad for him to shift his focus outward for awhile
obi-wan was right to call out his reluctance to think of it (let alone talk about it) as an obstacle in dealing with his trauma. but also!! him learning to be more vulnerable that way would help facilitate deeper CR with his castmates and current friendgroup
it's tricky, 'cause I do think a lot of his "rootlessness" comes from an earnest place of wanting to live in the present without getting too attached to any single state of being. embracing change is a fundamental part of what he does
but at the same time, that tendency does make it easy for him to compartmentalize, or like. just go in another direction if there's a personal problem he'd rather avoid
and how it's starting to look like the elven elite might be appropriating druidic practices in order to maintain tighter control of their territory and subjects :x
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