My FIL has been through a lot of heartache and yet he can still stoically and sagely work through it - I think it's amazing.

He just advised me that I should just strop stressing about fixer-upping this house because that can be done next year or the year after.

As long as the house is structurally sound, I shouldn't feel obligated to carry out the projects that WE as 2 people have planned on when we bought the house. I don't know why I felt such an obligation. Part of me feels like it's a way to keep his memory alive.

Which make sense to me, I don't know why I didn't see it that way. I'm holding on to so many things that me and him have planned and felt the need to see it through. And then get overwhelmed because of course everything we planned had assumed that there will be two of us.

I'M SORRY GUYS i'm such a downer today on a Friday. Ugh. I need cheesecake.

You feel how you feel, and you don't have to apologize for expressing that. That's what we are here for!

It's hard to let go of the plans and the possibilities.

hi ily

i see so much growth in this plurk, don't be sorry. im proud of you

Your father in law is kind hearted and wise, his son didn't fall far from the tree. Good peoples I'm happy to hear anything you want to talk about.

Thank you for feeling able to talk to us about it, you’re going through something so horrible. We’re proud of you and we love you