My activity dropped off a bit with Faramir this month because I got distracted by Hawkeye's engagement with the event, but I am still really enjoying playing him and I'm glad I apped him
I also gave him the first stirrings of hunger, and I would like to start playing with that in the next month or two, where he's like "now i have Proved that this is surmountable" and gets on his high horse
I'm also really excited by the fact that this month honestly reinvigorated my Hawkeye muse, this is the first time in a while where I've felt like I got to do something new with him
either way it's going to be someone obnoxious and angry who hates everybody and who will ensure that I continue to annoy people ICly and OOCly and for that i am sorry
like, I have been doing a lot of reflection the past month or two, and I'm very tangled in like... I have fun with the characters I play, but a lot of that fun is very. aggro. and I do worry that it's not fun for the people I'm playing with
and that self-consciousness affects both of these potential apps because a. they are both Very That, and b. they are both the sort of character I am aware is considered Cringe by the wider community and apparently my brain has decided to care about that?
(Kreacher because he's an Harry Potter, and Bethan because I am not sure exactly where the wider DWRP community falls on OCs these days but I'm still always neurotic about them)
anyway, moving on from that: I have been playing Casimir on memes again and I think I've decided, as a result, not to plan on bringing him back to Ryslig. because honestly while he was a lot of fun when he worked, I think he was also a big part of my burnout.
In a game like Ryslig, I think I would only be able to play him properly if he was the only character I was playing. And I don't want him to be the only character I play, he's awful and his voice is one of the least stable ones I have.
(I am, however, less self-conscious about him as a character, because while he is objectively just the absolute worst, he's also objectively the bad guy and that makes me feel less uncertain than Bethan does. I don't feel as much like people will assume I agree with him.)
I think both Bethan and Casimir (and probably Faramir) have a common problem in Ryslig, though, which is that they're characters who make it really hard to balance IC stubbornness and determination to change things with a setting that is, OOCly, not really able to change that drastically
(and I think that was a lot of my burnout last year, too, was playing 2/4 characters who SHOULD have been doing everything in their power to destabilise the setting, but were OOCly limited in what I was comfortable having them try. it was my own fault but it was more than i could really manage, especially while trying to do Foggie stuff as well)
which... while I'm playing Faramir, who is also trying to DEFEAT THE EVIL and SLAY THE FOG, might be a better approach to take than bringing Bethan back
i feel you on that re: bethan. i would love to have her back but it is something that's draining for giorno, and he has a lot more to ground him and is less fanatical (for lack of a better word) than bethan. i can see how it would be hard to work with that in the long term
outside of Ryslig I have also been considering that, instead of apping a third to Rys, I might take
chris 🌦️
up on her offer to join Meta Heroes? if my rp drive continues to be stronger
I thought about going back to Abraxas but honestly it sounds like so much of the CR I did manage to build would be completely different if I brought Susan back, and I was struggling to find a direction there, so...
I don't think I'd be up for apping that soon, to be honest. maybe the next round? Especially if you still want your character's brother bc I would want some time to make sure I could make him work.
kreacher would be Really neat to see especially having seen your thoughts I admit but like, you've given yourself plenty of time to think on it as well, so definitely use that time in the sense of like. Thinking it over, not dwelling on anything, etc
GET TO A LIBRARY FARAMIRand I feel you on that burnout re. character should ICly be doing setting-changing things you can't do for OOC reasons
but like, you've given yourself plenty of time to think on it as well, so definitely use that time in the sense of like. Thinking it over, not dwelling on anything, etc