Why do I keep doing this. Every time I let my guard down and feel bad for mom, even try to do something nice for her, it ends with me annoyed and with regrets. Every fucking time.

Mom's been ultra stressed lately because of several different things, so I figured "Hey, why don't I take her to this diner I found that's nearby? It's rated highly, has a cute aesthetic, I think it'll be a good time".

She felt bad about not going yesterday since she made other plans without telling me about them, but it's whatever. We try again today

And even before we set foot out the fucking house, it's "Hey, wear that new sweater I got you! Don't forget to take down the garbage! Wait, I left my phone! I'll wait for you downstairs. Make sure to bring up the box of mac and cheese when we come back"

Not all in one breath or in that order, but still

So I immediately start having regrets, but try to bear with it anyway. We drive, the place is packed because Sunday afternoons are a bad time to go anywhere. That part I get, that doesn't bother me. Sucks, but it's no big deal

Then mom complains the GPS is turning her around when she forgot to make the turn it suggested. I didn't say anything

We try to hit up another diner to at least get some milkshakes. They're packed, too, it's whatever

Mind you, mom decided to go outside without a mask

Because she left hers upstairs and didn't feel like going back up again after already doing so for her phone

"Eh, they're not mandatory anyway".

Even if they're not, even if way too many people in this neighborhood don't wear masks, don't you dare be this stupid

So I'm already annoyed, we go back home, she's reminding me of this fucking mac and cheese box I grab before picking up sis' package. We argue a little because the trunk was wide open when we went in, I point this out to her, she mentions I should've closed it when I got the box, which I didn't and I probably should have

But whatever, I'm annoyed at this point

Especially since, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret here

One of the easiest ways to frustrate me or piss me off is to bring attention to any mistake I make

Like, if I bump against the trash can aggressively because we have to tell all of our deliverers to leave packages behind the trash cans so package thieves are less likely to snatch them up? Responding to it with a "Wepa!" is only going to anger me

(Wepa being a very Latino phrase you usually say when expressive positive things like "that's cool" or "good job".)

(Tho I'm used to it being said after making a mistake or accidentally making a loud sound when I'm trying to be quiet and ehhhjsifg I just don't like it)

So that's me, trying to do a good thing today and instead getting easily frustrated by mom and caught up in my fragile emotions

Time to not do anything

Augh, I'm sorry you had to go through that. Especially since you were trying to be really nice, too. Just seems a bit ungrateful.

god...I think your relationship with your mom would benefit so greatly from the two of you not living together

I couldn't agree more