[Work] People. People. It's the night before Halloween, and Halloween falls on a Sunday this year. Can we all just accept the fact that people are going to probably party until midnight, and possibly later, on Saturday? Can we please have a little bit of understanding?
Like. I know people call and make noise complaints every fuckin' holiday ever, but it really never fails to get annoying. As long as it's not like...a fuckin' Animal House-level frat house rager, just put in your ear plugs and let the people have their party for one night out of the year.
...So. When you call 911 for my city, there is a 15-second message thaat plays if you can't get through to someone immediately. "You have reached xyz 911. Do not hang up. Please hold for the next available call taker. ~Repeats in Spanish~" And it repeats itself, with only two seconds between every time it plays.
Imagine, with the frequency of hearing that message basically played four times a minute, how quickly your brain turns to fucking mush when you get put on hold while waiting for someone to answer for 20. Fucking. Minutes.
why do people need repeated instructions like that, because you know they only implemented that to stop people from hanging up (and, knowing people, probably re-dialing in some sort of weird attempt to get through faster... which probably causes more delays)
Also, those people who ask me a question, get my answer, ask me again with slightly different verbiage, get the same exact answer, and then insist on reiterating their question as if the answer is going to change from the past two times they've asked it are the types of people who make me want to reach through a phone and slap a bitch.
"If my sister was arrested but I have her license, would you still see her in the system?" "I'd be able to see her." "But she doesn't have her license." "We would have her under her name." "She wouldn't be under like a Jane Doe or something without her license?"
Guy calls in, wants to make a complaint, call is very muffled and sounds like the mic is peaking. Guy gets angry and pissy with me over me having trouble understanding him and hangs up in his face.
Me: GOOD JOB, DUMBASS. YOUR COMPLAINT ISN'T GOING THROUGH, NOW. I HOPE THE NEIGHBOR KEEPS PLAYING THEIR MUSIC UNTIL NOON, AT LEAST.
There is n o f u c k i n g excuse to treat service workers like shit, and anyone who does can stick their dick in a cage full of badgers for all I fucking care.
/Familiar blocked-number call comes in, which is 99.99999% of the time a call from the frequent problem caller who's life goal is to make our lives a living Hell.../
Me: /Answers the phone in a bubbly, obnoxiously-happy tone that is sure to piss him off./
/Goes on her last break. Comes back with the last two ounces of maker's mark, dosed with a few drops of melon flavoring and some ice, since she apparently ran out of her mint simple syrups and couldn't make a mint julep/ LET'S DO THIS SHIT. LAST HOUR AND A HALF OF MY SHIFT. DRINKIN' IT UP. HO YEAH
/Tosses in some edible mica drink glitter, as a treat to herself, because she doesn't get to use it as much as she'd like, and she loves to eat the glitter. ;w;/
Me:
Me: /Answers the phone in a bubbly, obnoxiously-happy tone that is sure to piss him off./
Phone hangs up immediately.