About 5 or 6 pm I lost my phone somewhere in the house. I had a hole in my shorts pocket, I was carrying the cat around trying to get her to eat or look awake because this was Day 2 of her not eating
And I can't find it. And I know I didn't lose it somewhere not in the house because I used it as a two-factor authentication to log into work and I didn't leave the house at all after I logged in.
And I go "shit maybe I left it on the porch by accident when I held Frankie out there around 6. I bet it fell out of my pocket and I was too worried about the cat not eating to notice
I open the front door to the porch and the chain that Sergio installed has been forced open. The porch door is swinging. All the cigarette butts are gone again
Predictably he gets upset and goes out to the porch to investigate the scene of the crime while I look at Frankie on the bed who is still lethargic as fuck and needs to go to the vet still
And I look at mom and tell her to breathe and go "It's not anyone's wallets. It's not a checkbook. It's not our house keys. It's a phone. We can shut it down remotely and get a new one. No one is hurt. We're okay."
And I start making a priority list out loud for the three of us because we also have Cousin's Day in New Hampshire to get to and my grandfather's 90th birthday, also today
"We call the vet first. Get Frankie over there, make sure she can eat tonight. Then I go over to verizon to make sure we've done everything we need to do. Buy a new phone there. Then go to a locksmith or a home security guy to come over and reinstall a better lock and walk us through what we need to do.
Then put a claim in to the home insurance. Maybe call the non-emergency police line just in case. But honestly this was just me being stupid about my phone."
Mom needs to take a shower, so I wrap her cast arm and call the vet, vet has an opening at 10 and now it's 8:30 so I can probably duck out to the verizon store and get a new phone at 9ish
So I tell him, as gently as I can, that we need a professional home security guy now and I'm going to go to verizon so he should probably wash that off.
And Mom sticks her head out of the shower to tell him that the reason I say no is because I don't have a phone and god forbid he jumps my car, and then it goes for an hour before I get stranded somewhere without a phone
Apparently what had happened was when we lifted the mattresses up to grab Frankie last night for her meds, the phone slipped out and was in a crack next to the wall and that's why I couldn't see it
We go to the vet. Get more medication. Vet seems optimistic about non-steroid anti-inflammatories combined with pain meds. Frankie gets a "very reactive" note in her file when the vet goes to inspect her mouth and she flattens her ears, presses her body against mine for a wall and scratches the fuck out of both of us.
Me: Nope. Didn't have my phone
Me: Nope. Didn't have my phone