[mute][nerd rage][castlevania]
Golems don't bleed.

"But Kyp—"
No. Golems do not bleed

That defeats the entire purpose of them being unfeeling, unstoppable automations carved and crafted to take on a specific function

"What if it's a flesh golem"
Then it's a Legion, and they didn't have the budget to actually art that to life. Which actually would have been WAY more interesting, thematically speaking, than "drop a patch of bossfights in there"

Y'know. Because Isaac and Hector being Hell Forgers and that meaning "crafting abominations from the pits of the tortured in hell" according to Netflixvania.

Let that percolate for a second. Instead of faceless random vamps + two golems and the biggest waste of a Gorgoth I've ever seen, they could've used Legion.

An otherworldly spiritual furnace encased in the absolutely disgusting layer of hundreds to even thousands of no-longer-recognizable dead, trapped forever in their torment and completely sapped of anything even remotely resembling free will or agency, to say the least of thinking ability.

I Have No Mouth Yet I Must Scream level torture, pulling shield duty, swam duty, and sheer disturbia

But nope—golems. Bleeding golems.

Bleeding golems obviously made of mineral but somehow someone thought it was a neat idea for them to have blood

Which actually could be a good idea if, y'know, it had signs of arms or legs or thickets of flaking, dusty hair knots jutting out of it from where its victims were squished into fleshy jam consistence within its body.

But nah they just bleed.

feh.

lol sounds like edge for edges sake

...

it is and it was just a youtube clip

oh god i thought i put this behind me

I...okay Imma just. Mn. You know the thing I liked best about S1 of Netflixvania? The weight on the characters afflicted through the antagonists.

Surface level, people likely/maybe will bitch about why Dracula isn't sending things to kill shit. But that was never a gripe for me. It's a war. It's the worse kind of war because the war is man versus The Other.

Not Man vs Nature, or Man vs Man. The Other has insane potential. In this case, The Other is hell on Earth. Unforgiving, relentless, absolutely sadistic evils allowed to walk the planet again with the express purpose of kiling and torturing Wallachia.

(I'd say the world, but this is Netflixvania so we're not going that far)

And for those short eps, they conveyed that admirably well. The background characters were beaten, desperate, and confused. The corrupt were drowning in their own hubris (or made to drown in it). The hero wanted nothing to do with any of it because he'd already been cast out and was like "you brought this on yourselves"

That conveyance could have come back in various forms. It never really did. The war was more or less made to sit in the corner

Something like Legion should have been used. Instead of beating Hector half to death for so little reason, he could have been made to do that. Or Isaac could have in order to effect a good counter army. One of the two.

Except now I remember they actually wasted Legion on a boss fight. Such a representation missed there. I'm just gobsmacked.

And yes, Golgoth was entirely wasted

the bosses the monsters could've been symbols to aid that war—variations on the sins of mankind, or the virtues they were meant to corrupt.

Golgoth alone should have been a gentle giant turned absolute abomination, chomping on and firing at anything that would move. It was originally the Lochness and then taken & corrupted by Dracula

That could've made for interesting appealing attempts. But it was the thing they fought after the golems died and now I am sad