i've been thinking a lot lately about media i like that most people around me dislike/hate

there have been a lot of situations over the years where i like a thing, and then i see a friend plurking about it and they and their friends are just tearing into it, absolutely eviscerating the thing i like

usually for very valid reasons

and i'll be like. "hm. this feels bad"

"everyone here is very justified in not liking this thing, but i still like it, and now i feel like my liking of the thing isnt justified"

this happens frequently enough that ive taken to assuming i just have low standards when it comes to media

but i think maybe that's not actually what's happening here

i might need a bit to figure out how to explain the particular realization i had here

i think my habit of saying i have "low standards" is probably too self-critical

it's a form of negative self-talk and i need to reframe it

so i figured, like

all media is flawed

either those flaws kill it for you, or they don't

it all depends on how much you're willing to buy in to the premise

the difference between someone who was turned off from a piece of media because of, like, narrative inconsistency or weird pacing or half-baked characterization

and someone like me who recognizes those critiques as true and valid, but still likes the thing

is just our level of buy-in

and i think i just have a higher baseline level of buy-in than most people

it leads me to enjoy a lot of things that many of my friends can't stand

and sure, it feels bad when my friends dislike a thing i like

but i have to teach myself not to assume this makes me stupid or that it means the things i like are bad

because i'm very susceptible to those kinds of thought patterns

the lesson, i guess, is that when a critical conversation about something you like makes you feel bad, you have to mute and move on

going back to it to read every comment just to stew in that feeling is a form of self-harm

and i also have to learn to let myself enjoy things my friends have said they dislike

there have been a few cases where i thought "oh that game looks really cool" but then someone vaguely critiques it and then i get anxious about picking it up

so i just dont play it even though i really wanted to

this plurk brought to you by me finally buying Murder By Numbers and thinking it's Pretty Neat, Actually

though really this whole conversation applies to a lot of other media i like or could potentially like

all of this. yes.

yeah, i think i have things i have very low standards for, and other things i have very...not high standards, but like a low tolerance for certain things? And neither of those is a bad thing

I have a very low tolerance for A Lot of romance tropes, and typically won't consume romance media unless friends or family makes me. On the other hand, i have a high tolerance for a certain type of Very Meaty Violence that's a dealbreaker for a lot of my friends, i just gotta watch those things on my own

and if my friends think a movie is gross and dumb for being over violent, (and probably says upsetting things about our culture that that's even allowed on film/TV) i mean, they're probably right, but i still like it

i don't really have anything to add, just to say that i think the nuanced conclusion you've laid out here is really good and on point and i support your efforts to Enjoy Things even if other people dislike them

I came to the same conclusion a while back because I had the same thoughts. good on you for making the connection and more healthily enjoying things that bring you joy c: