Quinneapolis
Watching Wandering Earth
Quinneapolis
This premise is buck wild
Quinneapolis
It's the future
Quinneapolis
the Sun is suddenly degenerating and expanding
Quinneapolis
it will consume the Earth in 100 years and destroy the solar system in 300
Quinneapolis
so humanity's plan
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is to build 10,000 11-km-tall Earth Engines
Quinneapolis
and push the planet out of the solar system
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to a new solar system
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under each earth engine is an underground city
Quinneapolis
which are the only places where humans will be able to live for the next 2500 years
Quinneapolis
that and the Earth Navigation Space Station, 100,000 km ahead of the planet on its journey
Quinneapolis
17 years later
Quinneapolis
people are learning about the seasons in Beijing-3
pixie lovemail
okay, this seems pretty wicked actually
Quinneapolis
it's not netfloox
Quinneapolis
on*
Quinneapolis
it's on netfloox
Princess Emily
thank God it's on netfloox for us to watch
Quinneapolis
our plucky hero wants to use thermal suits to escape to another city
Quinneapolis
planning a slingshot past jupiter
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-84C on the surface
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-119F
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today we enter jupiter's orbit
Quinneapolis
Dad works on the space station, but is returning to Earth tomorrow
Quinneapolis
weird hearing Chinese spoken with a Russian accent
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Jupiter gravitational spike detected
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Disaster warning protocols activated
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Earth is now on a collision course with Jupiter
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oops, the hero is in prison
Quinneapolis
Liu Qi is the brother
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Duoduo is the sister
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Beijing-3 is collapsing
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Earth engine system failing
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1112 facilities
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3400 facilities
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things have gotten real bad real fast
Quinneapolis
37 hours to planetary collision
Quinneapolis
The 4500 disabled engines must be reactivated within 36 hours or 3.5 billion people will die
Quinneapolis
space station crew are all being put into hibernation so they can dedicate 100% of power to the rescue mission
Quinneapolis
The Wandering Earth Project has failed.
Quinneapolis
The Earth has missed its last chance of escape
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now instigating the Helios Project
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300,000 human embryos and DNA maps of all Earth species are stored o the navigation station
Quinneapolis
to revive the human race on a new planet
Quinneapolis
Earth will fall into jupiter in 7 days
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Jupiter's gravitational pull has siphoned massive amounts of hydrogen off of Earth's atmosphere
Quinneapolis
and that atmospheric strand.......
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is FLAMMABLE
Quinneapolis
IT'S TIME TO SET JUPITER ON FIRE
Princess Emily
whAT
Quinneapolis
They're going to put all the power in the main earth engine into one of its seven nozzles
Quinneapolis
to fire a 70.000 km beam of plasma at Jupiter
Quinneapolis
which will ignite the atmospheric drain
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sending a shockwave back to earth
Quinneapolis
to knock it back on course
Princess Emily
holy shit
Quinneapolis
this movie is amazing
Quinneapolis
someone looked at all the math involved in the logistics of this plot
Quinneapolis
threw it in the garbage
Niamh Vibes
everything about this rules
Quinneapolis
and went 'yo what will be the SICKEST SHIT'
EsperBot
holy shit
Quinneapolis
Israeli scientists proposed this plan seven hours ago
Quinneapolis
the probability of success is zero
Quinneapolis
all remaining rescue personnel within range of the final engine
Quinneapolis
must choose to spend their last few days with their family
Quinneapolis
or throw that chance away to aid in a mission that has no hope of success
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the beam is still 5000km short
Quinneapolis
three stations fired, none of them made it far enough
Quinneapolis
but
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the earth navigation station has 300,000 tons of fuel
Quinneapolis
if they drive it into the beam, it will extend it far enough
Quinneapolis
but the AI that runs the station won't allow this action because it endangers the helios project
Quinneapolis
but Liu's dad used bootleg vodka to set the AI core on fire
Quinneapolis
so that he can suicide dive into the beam and save the planet
Quinneapolis
oh okay he detached the hibernation units to send them back to earth
Quinneapolis
so he's the only one who will die in the station
Quinneapolis
his own fault for promising to see his family again at the pre-timeskip part of a disaster movie
Quinneapolis
this makes NO sense and it's AMAZING
Quinneapolis
jupiter is on fire
Quinneapolis
the shockwave hits in 7 minutes
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EARTH SURVIVED
Gabiluzbad
yo what the fuck
Princess Emily
"jupiter is on fire" jesus
Quinneapolis
please watch this movie
kamikasei
Getter Robo Armageddon reimagined as a real robot show