Quinneapolis
I think the most important traits a bad story can have are confidence and ambition
Quinneapolis
if a story doesn't really know where it's going and just does something safe instead of something interesting, I don't want to watch it
Quinneapolis
but like
Quinneapolis
give me a show that's just an unfiltered authorial VISION
Quinneapolis
and the vision is GARBAGE
Quinneapolis
and I'm in for the whole ride
BERSERKER
objection
Quinneapolis
give me Aquarion, which thinks it's setting a new gold standard for storytelling and mecha action
Quinneapolis
and it fucking sucks SO HARD at BOTH
BERSERKER
aquarion log--oh you're actually defending aquarion never mind
Quinneapolis
I'm not defending Aquarion
Quinneapolis
I'm saying it's awful in a way that kept me RIVETED
BERSERKER
I mean, you're saying it's the kind of bad you want, yeah
Quinneapolis
for a 26 EPISODES
Quinneapolis
a whole*
Quinneapolis
it's bad and I was enthralled by how bad it is
Quinneapolis
I hated every episode of it and hurled myself into the next episode to hate it even more
Quinneapolis
anyone can fail to do a backflip
Quinneapolis
but sometimes someone says "CHECK THIS SHIT OUT" and front flips by mistake, down a staircase, knocking over a typewriter in such a way that it writes a short essay denying the holocaust on the way down the stairs
BERSERKER
god, that statement there is in its own way a perfect example because geez quinn what the fuck
Quinneapolis
I'm unclear on what you mean by that
Quinneapolis
the only point I'm trying to make is that the genre of Bad I enjoy the most is when someone has a crystal clear artistic vision, except the vision is garbage, and they're also hysterically incompetent
knotsferatu
did u mean: jupiter ascending
Quinneapolis
honestly my love of Jupiter Ascending is like half this and half just completely sincere
knotsferatu
no i agree i sincerely love jupiter ascending because it loves being trash and revels in it
knotsferatu
but its also very fun
Quinneapolis
Jupiter Ascending is a perfect movie because when I talk about it I get to use the phrase "Flying rollerblading space werewolf boyfriend"
knotsferatu
5 minute long space bureaucracy sequence
knotsferatu
i guess this also accurately describes The Room
Quinneapolis
yes
Quinneapolis
Tommy Wiseau had a VISION
Quinneapolis
and his vision was STUPID and he had NO ability to execute on it
knotsferatu
honestly you know what it DOESNT describe? bee movie. bee movies strength is in the fact that it has no clear vision beyond “bee jokes” and therefore every other facet of it is totally off the fucking rails
Quinneapolis
there are certainly exceptions
Rama
This is why we keep talking about David Cage
Quinneapolis
but bee movie has a similar energy just because like
Rama
The living embodiment of Dunning-Kruger syndrome
Quinneapolis
it still lets you direct most of your ire to it at one single person
Quinneapolis
that's what it is really, I think, I want ONE person to be responsible for something's bad decisions, on purpose
Quinneapolis
I want a NEMESIS
EsperBot
One reason why The Room in particular stands out is that it was filmed on actual film and had real hollywood crew working on it
EsperBot
so it looks like a real movie
oh i'm scary
have you seen the Last Airbender movie
Quinneapolis
an auteur of garbage
Quinneapolis
I have not
oh i'm scary
I wonder if it'd fit
EsperBot
it has all the visual hallmarks of being an actual movie
EsperBot
but it's not
Quinneapolis
TLA was like...
Rama
The Last Airbender was a weird one because it clearly has problems caused by Shyamalan and it clearly has problems caused by studio interference, but they're completely different problems
Quinneapolis
I was like "I want to like this but also it's doing SO much whitewashing and it's going to be a huge problem"
Rama
So every part of the film is bad
Quinneapolis
but then it turned out to also just be a fucking awful movie
Quinneapolis
and I was like "oh thank god"
Quinneapolis
and never watched it
Rama
Pretty much yeah
Quinneapolis
see also: Ghost in the Shell
Rama
It had no redeeming qualities whatsoever
Quinneapolis
I always breathe a sigh of relief when a movie with deeply problematic surrounding discourse is also just a worthlessly awful movie
knotsferatu
see i feel that the Creation born of this process has to be entertaining or fun to watch
Quinneapolis
so we can throw out the briefcase instead of having to unpack it
EsperBot
Neil Breen films are basically Tommy Wiseau without the professional staff and equipment (and plus some buckwild political fixation)
knotsferatu
ghost in the shell and last airbender are just Bad in every way so they dont even have value as a hate watch
BERSERKER
I can second that Neil Breen is a terrible, amazing visionary
Quinneapolis
I should watch a Neil Breen movie
Quinneapolis
just for the experience
EsperBot
They're mostly on youtube
knotsferatu
oh - a good example of this? the twilight movies
Rama
The Twilight movies know they're trash and they own it, not gonna lie
knotsferatu
total garbage, clear vision, completely entertaining
EsperBot
You can buy them on DVD from his personal website. He only sells his most recent one, but if you email him and say you actually wanted to buy one of his earlier ones, he'll switch it out in your order
Quinneapolis
youtube sounds like a better bet
EsperBot
which is the funniest thing I've ever heard of
Quinneapolis
he sounds like the kind of guy you shouldn't feel TOO bad about pirating from
EsperBot
Yeah no it’s all good
EsperBot
That’s be a fun group watch
Rabbit Crimes
I’ve only engaged it via reviews but Neil Breen’s library is a hell of a trip
Quinneapolis
all I know about it is something something ten minute monologue from the protagonist intercut with bankers committing suicide
Rabbit Crimes
Especially when watched in chronological order of release
Rabbit Crimes
Yeah that’s the most recent one
Rabbit Crimes
Fateful Findings, I think
Quinneapolis
that's the one I know about
EsperBot
He just came out with another one, called Twisted Pair
ғᴏxʏᴍᴏʀᴏɴ
DO NOT WATCH FATEFUL FINDINGS
ғᴏxʏᴍᴏʀᴏɴ
SAVE YOURSELF
Quinneapolis
why on earth would I want to do that
Quinneapolis
save myself, I mean, not watch fateful findings
ғᴏxʏᴍᴏʀᴏɴ
i have seen fateful findings.
Quinneapolis
I am aware
ғᴏxʏᴍᴏʀᴏɴ
i can tell you. it is not even the fun garbage to watch.
Quinneapolis
I can only think offhand of one thing I hatewatched to completion and genuinely regret
Quinneapolis
(Valvrave)
Princess Emily
valvrave...
Quinneapolis
don't watch valvrave
Quinneapolis
it's acidically bad, then boring at great length