Thank you all. I feel a bit better now that I got something to eat, but still full of anxiety. My mom is getting her biopsy results back today regarding the lump they found in her breast and we don't know if it'll be good or bad news.
And my dad has been very sharp and angry for like two days now, and I know he has reason to be between my mom and my grandmother, but it's not helping my mindset.
I made the mistake of going to see Nana yesterday for what was supposed to be a fun, casual day, and came home and burst into tears instead because it became so damn stressful. She lost her hearing aids and we have no idea when my uncle will take her to get new ones. Not being able to communicate with her has become so frustrating.
I told my dad I don't want to see her again until she has new ones and he got all snippy and angry with me. I'm sorry, being around her has become toxic for my mental health, and as much as I love her, I can't deal with her bullshit on top of everything else on my plate right now.
Yeah. It's just A Lot to deal with right now between the new job, setting things up for the other job I'm starting, my mom getting her results back, my dad still in recovery from surgery, and Nana being Nana.
It didn't help yesterday that my older sis, who babies Nana incessantly and caters to her every whim, took her side at every single junction. She also kept correcting me because she's a know it all and apparently the smartest person in any room. See, she doesn't have any problems visiting Nana because all she's ever done is go once or twice a month.
She stays and then she leaves when it becomes too much for her. She's never stayed there for an entire weekend or gone a week or even the four day schedule I was on for a while. She has NO IDEA what it's like to be around her when the going gets tough. If ever it's too much for her to handle, she just pitches a fit like a child and leaves.
Bad news. Sis picked up the phone just as my mom called my dad and overheard her saying the biopsy was positive for cancer. So sad right now, I just cried for like five minutes. I mean, it's not the end of the world, since they just need to do a lumpectomy and then radiation for six weeks to treat it, but it's still scary to hear.
here, plz enjoy this snail