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[CB/Dark Tower] Double plurk (sorry) but I caught the first part of The Dsrk Tower movie last night and WHEW
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Idris Elba is so FUCKING HOT but wait that isnt the point
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There's lines that are very Spike, the gunslinger's mantra?
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NOW I CANT REMEMBER IT ALL but it was like "i dont shoot with my hands, I shoot with my mind, i dont kill with my gun, I kill with my heart"
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I was like OOOOOOO DAMN
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But I dont know if this matters to anyone but Ink
✶ 絶対嘘じゃない、愛してる
I KILL WITH MY HEART!!!
✶ 絶対嘘じゃない、愛してる
the movie was a fucking mess but I love it
veth
wefeelspooky
hnnnnngh yes he's so hot in that movie
wefeelspooky
also the gunslinger's creed gave me CHILLS
LOVE☆STRUCK
IT'S VERY MUCH A MESS but kinda fun?
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Also again you get to stare at Cowboy Idris Elba all movie and I just want him to hold me in his giant arms
Tonberry King
of all the things wrong in the movie, he was not one of them
LOVE☆STRUCK
He is never the wrong thing in the movie
✶ 絶対嘘じゃない、愛してる
I like the dark tower movie a lot but uh NOT AS A DARK TOWER MOVIE
LOVE☆STRUCK
YEAH THAT'S FAIR sometimes adaptations are better off as uh
A Re-Imagining or something instead of claiming to be the real thing
Tonberry King
superorbital: yes that, that's a good way to put it
colorful bunch
it's like god trying to apologize for the way things are, here, have idris elba
colorful bunch
and tbh it's a very compelling apology
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I mean yeah he sure is
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Thank you gos
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God
fish deranged
lmao yeah I never plan to see it because I know I'll just get mad
fish deranged
but not because of Idris he did nothing wrong
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Just do what I did and watch onky the Showtime movie trailers for it repeatedly
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Idris/Roland catching the bullets in his gun mid-air to reload the gun was suck as fick tho
fish deranged
lord
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like honestly that's the thing i'm most scared of, that they made him Too Cool
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because a huge thing with the fandom is a lot of it's old white dudes who make roland into a power fantasy when he's just a big idiot who got stabbed in the ass with a fork and cries constantly
fish deranged
(i'm exaggerating, he's allowed to be cool)
fish deranged
(the gunslinger's mantra is REAL good)
corpse bride
i read the books, but i still want to watch the movie, even knowing how fandom feels about it, because Idris Elba
corpse bride
just gonna turn my brain off and watch that gorgeous man
fish deranged
yeah that's a very valid feel
fish deranged
honestly if anything it's the rumblings about how much they changed jake that i know are going to make me want to climb out a window and directly into the ocean
fish deranged
leave my son alone
LOVE☆STRUCK
I think there's also credit to turning it from a white power fantasy into a black male rising from the ashes
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But yeah Jake is.. Different
He's still cool from what I saw!!! But not the Jake I rped against
fish deranged
YEAH casting elba was a great decision
fish deranged
especially when roland's race is 1. never explicit in the books and 2. not important to his character
fish deranged
there is a character whose race is important but he's not her
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and like. canonically it's not a white power fantasy. that's just a product of the shitty, shitty old guard fandom
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and every illustrator deciding to ignore canon descriptions and just draw him as clint eastwood
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Also! I really hate his stepdad and am kind of angry at his mom
fish deranged
oh my god did they make it his stepdad instead of his actual dad
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I know I dont share her life experiences but if ANY PERSON WHO DID NOT RAISE MY SON TALKED TO HIM OR ABOUT HIM LIKE THAT
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I'D KILL THEM???
fish deranged
im wheezing what did they do
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"He's driving us apart" ok so leave then bitch
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so they like completely rewrote his backstory, then
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because in the original his parents just downright don't fucking care about him at all
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except insofar as he's important to their Image
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The guy she's dating is a huge fuck
It might actually be his dad??? But I'd still kick him out
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Calling my son crazy how the fuck dare you
fish deranged
i mean in the original his dad's a huge fuck
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he's a tv exec who does coke
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and his mom is constantly zonked out on valium
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His mom cares about him/is sad he "isnt happy" bc he used to be sucj a happy kid
fish deranged
huh
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And like completely ignores thhe fact the dad character just fucking hates his ass and wants to be alone with his mom
fish deranged
so yeah they completely rewrote it
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i mean i guess a kid from the 80s is ~too difficult to relate to~
LOVE☆STRUCK
Yeah this time it was either a death or divorce got rid of the dad that loved him and replaced him w a verbally avusive partner to the mom
fish deranged
oh fuck that
fish deranged
the whole point of jake's relationship with roland is he's NEVER had that kind of attention
fish deranged
turning it into a replacement goldfish situation is shitty
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Not a single solid bone in her spine
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But she ~loves them~
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Yeah it's weird and just KINDA MADE ME ANGRY FOR HIM
fish deranged
like. one of the main ideas of dark tower is multiverse shit
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without spoiling too much, this is canonically a different universe than the books
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so like I can forgive that this is a 'different' jake or w/e and all the changes they made are perfectly reasonable with canon
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but also: fuck that
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taking all the teeth out of his situation is a weakass decision
fish deranged
everybody who joins up with roland is in a really incredibly low place and then they find each other and find a family and find something good, and cheapening that is Rude
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I mean I would still consider his situation bad and I think kind of demonstrative of how the public treats schizophrenics and the like? But also so much could have been solved if his mom hadnt let her boyfriend say shit
fish deranged
oh so they like. started off with him having his doubled memories?
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or did they just deadass make him schizophrenic
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i'm like fascinated by all these decisions tbh
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still not enough to watch the dang thing but like
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0kay
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(i ask because the doubled memory stuff is 1. super neat and also 2. book three stuff so it's interesting if they mashed it all together)
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Oh no it was doubled memories/visions of the tower
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But the school/his mom are shown treating him as though they think he is developing schizophrenia
fish deranged
YEAH
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in book three it's Real Bad for him
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She's sent him to 80 different therapists and all of them are like, assholes who keep treating him as though he's just dreaming/trying to snap him out of it
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And he's like you assholes i'm not hallucinating
fish deranged
god
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in the original he doesn't tell anybody
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and just suffers for months because he's afraid of being sent to an asylum
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He doesnt WANT to but his mom keeps making puppy eyes at him and he'd do anything for her excEPT go to the clinic run by The Skin People
fish deranged
it's so bizarre to me that they tried this hard to make his mom sympathetic
fish deranged
it was probably easier to write scenes for film with that angle
fish deranged
since in the original there's very little interaction, you just are in jake's head while he's struggling
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and that's not as exciting visually
LOVE☆STRUCK
Yeah that might be it, it would make sense
fish deranged
i also like that it's his stepdad because your ~real~ parents could never be that shitty!!
fish deranged
the important part is he gets to hang out with idris elba
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before idris elba also kills him
LOVE☆STRUCK
I dont think it was altogether a bad idea but I'm not a fan of the mom personally after she just kind of accepts the shit her bf says about him
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I MEAN THEY MIGHTA TRIED TO MAKE HIS PARENTS LOOK BETTER BUT UH
IT DIDN'T WORK
fish deranged
oh yeah i don't think any of this is bad necessarily like. wanting to update a story that's as old as this one is isn't an unreasonable thing
fish deranged
LMAO
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especially because book and film are so different
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i just personally have a giant hateboner for elmer chambers and want everybody else to understand it
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LMAO THAT'S ALSO FAIR THO
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And again i can only appreciate idris elba while he's on screen
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
Yeah they completely changed his backstory which like... with multiverse stuff that ain’t the WORST thing but it’s not Jake
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
I enjoyed it bc it was a thing I did together with Claire during her first visit that we made plans to do but W O O F
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
I’m more annoyed that they went out of their way to change his mom to actually giving a shit just so... they can have the man in black horrifically murder her later to traumatize Jake with
fish deranged
... lmao what
fish deranged
HE WAS ALREADY TRAUMATIZED TO BEGIN WITH
fish deranged
YOU DIDN'T NEED TO FRIDGE HIS MOM
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
YEAH
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
Y E A H
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
HE LEAVES HER AS A GIANT HUMAN SHAPED SOOT STAIN ON THE WALL OF HIS BEDROOM FOR HIM TO FIND LATER ITS. NOT GREAT.
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
I don’t wanna fill up this plurk with negativity about it but god just some of the decisions were baffling
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
Which blows bc the casting itself was chef’s kiss
Bᴇᴀsᴛ。
Like idris aside, McConnaughy shoulda been the perfect Walter if not for whatever the hell they chose to do with that character
fish deranged
that's so disappointing
fish deranged
because yeah he really was the perfect casting
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Man that sucks, i didnt get that far but I didnt expect her to die
I feel like that's just pain porn
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Why do some filmmakers just like to hurt people as though there's entertainment value in it and not as a part of advancing the stiryt
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Story...
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