but there are still obscure moments when she is certain there was a window, and she missed it, because she wasn't assigned to him and didn't realize it would shutter closed so hard after the volcano god thing
he made her feel safe, because he was so dangerous, and even though she absolutely knew he'd hurt her if they were opposed, he respected her from the beginning when they did their death knight deal
even if he IS responsible for it happening and, concurrently, for being alone, Dillon can't help some very strong slightly skewed "there but for the grace of Winston, Drew Camden, and Radio Joe go I....."
he's not at all sure how to be in love like a grown-up instead of a traumatized obsessive 17 year old but he is trying really hard because he wants this to be the rest of his life
oh anya :C <3 dillon's got an okay balance going. bill has no idea whether he has hooks in him or if dillon's messing with him by pretending to cooperate or what and the explanation that dillon gave is so far beyond anything he can even relate to that it was like someone describing an acid trip
he is going to have to learn how to apply his 'mother hen taking care of soldier instincts' to the problem of 'be considerate of people who you have actual personal relationships with sans professional structure'
(i was not in a good place when i decided to make arthas a fucked up story about someone who had every chance to be better and refused to anyway. i think with another chance i'd do it differently)
admittedly more because it's easy for that to sound like Q's naivité triggers when he talks about it than because he actually realizes what's unhealthy about it
but, straight up, Quentin just...feels like peace to him, in a way that is unconnected to the eternally-unobtainable-childhood-idyll, and that's not a thing he thought.......existed
unless you meant your lucifer, in which case also no, the aslan was not me, unless by aslan you mean my space emperor, which....I also don't think so but maybe there was something in a VIP flood...I AM LOW ON BRAIN CURRENT ORZ
The search continues! Hilariously you're my first bet for that because you're the person on my timeline who could pull him off. My second guess has been MIA for years, sadly. BUT ANYWAY Jedao and either of mine?
but....not even not trusting him, just. has him in this category with other rahal, who are the faction who carry out the remembrances and interrogations in addition to being space lawyers
and the guardians of orthodoxy which makes them, on some level, always and forever his enemies. which doesn't mean they can't ALSO be friends. but it means there are places the friendship can't go.
he really likes that Lark is a fellow Twisty who has ended up caring about steve, and that he cares about how soldiers are treated. Jedao is....endeared, just as much as he is twisty-fencing entertained
yeah, jedao can....I hate to use this phrasing because metagamers suck and it happens to charming bastards a lot, but Jedao has nigh-preternatural-intuition and a lot of experience and he can just fucking tell
yeah jedao is just like....he's simultaenously stupid ambitious and he has no self-worth at all, and his pride is...there but it's very compartmentalized into certain things
and he thinks it's really sad for someone who...like, wants to be and prides themselves on being effective and twisty and ruthless to be stymied by being so unpragmatic in that particular way
But yeah Lark really enjoys Jedao but at the same time he's a wolf and that means he plays really hard. He'd happily rip up the ship with Jedao over a game. He really wants to see what Jedao can do and what he can be made to do, but he's like "Even I know that's a bad idea"
jedao has been actually and indefinitely and with no ability to effect the situation trapped, and the barge is....not that. it's temporary and not even that complicated.
the thing is that Jedao would not happily rip up the ship, and would absolutely consider it losing badly to let Lark set terms of the game that lead to such a thing
Jedao's world is very hierarchical, and while there are problems with that, it's also very reassuring to him (even apart from 420 years in the military) and one of the few really...uncontaminated and unambiguously positive relationship types in his life has been teacher/student
dillon's got an okay balance going. bill has no idea whether he has hooks in him or if dillon's messing with him by pretending to cooperate or what and the explanation that dillon gave is so far beyond anything he can even relate to that it was like someone describing an acid trip
420 years in the military#nice