/[taz]; it occurred to me while I was in the shower today that Taako doesn't know what a fucking microwave is
curby&coughing
/[taz]; it occurred to me while I was in the shower today that Taako doesn't know what a fucking microwave is
/[taz]; it occurred to me while I was in the shower today that Taako doesn't know what a fucking microwave is
curby&coughing
WASHING MACHINE? PROBABLY NOT
curby&coughing
OVEN? DOUBTFUL
curby&coughing
like taz plays pretty fast and loose when it comes to technology but there's just no Way
a turtle
the taco secret is about to go very awry
mnnrrghdinosaur
Marian over here just shaking her head at all these fantasy nutjobs and their magic
curby&coughing
the two rowdy boys have to abandon their first apartment after about 20 minutes because they overloaded the microwave and now the whole place is on fire
curby&coughing
and/or flooded. i feel like it could go either way
Echo
Both.
curby&coughing
what I'm saying here is this is going to go Badly and I've never been more excited?????????
a turtle
okay what percent chance is there that they microwave tinfoil or leave a spoon in the dish theyre warming
curby&coughing
one hundred fucking percent
curby&coughing
magnus will do that in less than a fucking week
a turtle
i can hear the ones being rolled as we speak
curby&coughing
"but I don't want the spoon to be cold", he'll mutter, as taako realizes he doesn't know a single spell for water
a turtle
hot spoons cool nights
curby&coughing
to be completely fair I once nearly blew up my microwave because I didn't realize the pot I put in the microwave was metal in freshman year of college
curby&coughing
that was my Freshman Cooking Mistake
curby&coughing
for those who will inevitably ask why pot: i was out of bowls, and additionally, fuck you
Echo
I don't think I had a freshman cooking mistake, because I didn't cook as a freshman. ...or at all in college.
curby&coughing
I mean, it was less "cooking" and more "leftovers"
Echo
There are takeout places on campus, a reasonably cheap dining hall, and a surprising amount of things you can just eat right out of the box if you're not too inclined to feel shame for your bad life choices.
Echo
When I say I didn't cook, I mean I didn't cook.
curby&coughing
but the point is: current hadriel ideas are 1) magnus and taako end up in the fucking caves trying to escape because they're adventurers and can handle it and surprise they cannot
curby&coughing
and now 2) magnus and taako blow up a fucking microwav
curby&coughing
microwave*
curby&coughing
their first month is going to be a Trainwreck
a turtle
sounds pretty in keeping w/the taz aesthetic
Echo
I don't even know this canon, but from what I've picked up it sound like you've got them perfectly in-character, yeah.
curby&coughing
you're not even fucking wrong
curby&coughing
we may have enabled a merle earlier and if he shows up the next month they're both gonna let him bumble around and figure it out and film every time he fucks up
curby&coughing
honestly giving like, cell phone tier technology to these two with the capability to record video is going to be the end of them both
Chara Dont
the 'a turn in dnd is a vine' post is coming to mind
Echo
Yeah, all my TAZ knowledge comes from other peoples' tumblr posts, and I know three things: 1. Lup is the best. 2. Lucretia deserves a hug and a break. 3. Magnus rushes in.
Echo
None of these things suggest stable, normal people.
Chara Dont
your intuition is correct
curby&coughing
all of those things are real
curby&coughing
i'm so excited to write this fucking shitpost
FloppyFeet
MAGNUS RUSHES INto the caves like a focking fool
FloppyFeet
then instantly floods their house. with the oven somehow
curby&coughing
I mean the hadriel mods do note that like, the settings on those appliances are Weird
curby&coughing
what I'm saying here is: we can destroy everything
FloppyFeet
yeah lijke they dont know what a normal oven is. how are they supposed to wrangle one thats highly fucked up
curby&coughing
they're actually going to light the apartment on fire
curby&coughing
like this started as a joke but there's Just No Way they're not going to start at least 6 small fires in the first 24 hours
curby&coughing
prestidigitation can only snuff something the size of a torch, like, they are gonna die
curby&coughing
taako has to like, cone of cold it because he just Doesn't Have Any Water Spells
curby&coughing
and/or gust of wind. except then it could spread and they'd be Ultra Fucked
FloppyFeet
LMAO is the water producing spell for clerics... fuck its been a while since i played dnd
FloppyFeet
theres too many Spellz
FloppyFeet
yeah their house is gonna be unlivable nigh immediately
curby&coughing
find another house, take 2, its fine
curby&coughing
(and I think the water spell is a druid spell bc thats where I know it from)