Do you think the sentence would flow better structured differently? Cause it was kind of forced, most of my sources seem to put her name in the intro para somewhere
I will show how Genji is unsympathetically annoyed when his misconduct disappoints women enough that they express any emotion other than passive affection.
A lot of my sources use "I" but I'm less than lukewarm about it myself... This is a tightening of the first two sentences with the last part mostly unchanged
I'll leave that paragraph the way it is for now, I think the last sentence could be cleaned up and split but at this point generating more prose is a priority
I've got a lot of material lined up but this is really the... start... of writing anything like paragraphs that would be turned in, if that makes sense.
In analyzing the poetry of the Akashi chapter in the McCullough translation,[i.e. of the tale of Genji]I will show how Genji is unsympathetically annoyed when his misconduct disappoints women enough that they express any emotion other than passive affection.